My Quest for a Cal Poly Winter Playlist

It was the end of February, and I was fresh out of music. I’d listened to pop, jazz, soul, rock, metal, rap, bossa nova, reggaeton, and polka. I’d asked my friends, sister, dentist, and dog for song recommendations. I’d exhausted all of my playlists, including the cringey ones from middle school. I even tried to use the Spotify DJ. 

So naturally, I had to go around campus and ask everyone with headphones what they were listening to. As I plotted, more reasons to interview my peers accumulated—curiosity, making new friends, and, more than anything, making people feel special. How exciting would it be to graduate from pedestrian to interviewee? But it turned out to be way harder than I expected. More than two attempts and three excruciating hours later, I had just 27 songs.

For as long as humans have walked the Earth, communication has been one of our greatest assets. From inventing fire to inventing space travel, people talk about everything. Sharing ideas is the cornerstone of the human race. So why is it so hard to do?

Attempt #1 – The UU – February 28th

With an overdue article, a sinus infection, and two emotional-support friends, I braved the University Union. I walked around, trying to get my peers’ attention: 

“Hi, sorry to bother you, but can I ask what you’re listening to real quick?” 

I managed to ask five people before giving up. I got songs from two of them, but the other three couldn’t hear me. I entered each conversation half-confident. I thought it was a fun question, but was also anticipating judgment. I always hope someone “bothers” me in public, but other people might not feel the same. For reference, none of them were working on school work, and I was asking for 30 seconds of their time. Still, I spent the entire hour mortified. After adding those two songs to my survey, I went to Starbucks with my friends and took a full week to recharge my social battery.

Attempt #2 – Mustang Way – March 6th

For my second attempt, I had a new plan: I had my most outgoing friend (aptly named Joy) do it for me. This article was due at 11:59 pm, and I was at a low. As I sat against a concrete wall, she “bothered” 25 surveyees. And yet – almost every single one of them walked away smiling. Where I was avoiding eye contact and throwing out neverminds, she was getting people excited and making new friends. Where I was making myself invisible, she was making people feel seen. What was the difference? She was bringing her authentic self to each conversation.

Conclusions

About 2 years ago, my dad watched a one-off inspirational speech on TikTok that I think applies to my adventure. Here is the gist:

“If I were to walk up to you and say, ‘I hate your blue hair,’ what would you say?”

“I don’t have blue hair.”

“Exactly, you wouldn’t be affected by it. So if someone says, ‘You aren’t good enough,” you can just think, ‘Well, I am good enough. I don’t have blue hair.’ And then you’re truly free.”

With a 95% confidence interval, we can conclude that bringing yourself (warts and all) to your relationships (strangers or not) is the most effective way to communicate. As I watched my friend, I yearned for that kind of self-security. Not every person she talked to was particularly friendly. But, she didn’t take that on as a personal flaw. In situations where I would think, “What’s wrong with me?” she thought, “What was wrong with them?” Ergo, I’ve made a new vow to myself – I’m adopting her attitude. For better or worse, I will be Brooke every day.

When you know who you are, you know who you’re not. When you know you don’t have blue hair, you’re truly, truly free. And maybe you’ll get a cool playlist out of it too. 

The Playlist (eXplicit)

“abolish the IRS” – ptasinski, RJ Pasin

“Bounce” – Rema

“The Mercy of the Wind” – Million Eyes

“All I Want” – Kodaline

“Summer of ‘69” – Bryan Adams

“Can I Kick It?” – A Tribe Called Quest

“Come On Eileen” – Dexys Midnight Runners

“Scenes From An Italian Restaurant” – Billy Joel (my favorite person on Earth)

“The Stranger” – Billy Joel

“Stuck With U” – Ariana Grande, Justin Bieber

“The New Workout Plan” – Kanye West

“Bitch, Don’t Kill My Vibe” – Kendrick Lamar

“Oh U Went” – Young Thug, Drake

“Crowns For Kings” – Benny the Butcher, Black Thought

“Opendoors” – Jitwam

“generations in the making” – Abby Powledge

“You See the Geekin” – ShooterGang Kony

“Where The Hood At” – DMX

“Make You Mine” – Dominic Scott 

“Sally, When The Wine Runs Out” – ROLE MODEL

“Baby” – Mike Sherm

“Ramble On” – Led Zeppelin

“Some Nights” – fun.

“It’s ok I’m ok” – Tate McRae

“spread that puss” – Ayesha Erotica

“Beachtown” – Mo Lowda & the Humble

“Nonsense” – Sabrina Carpenter

• #self reflection
• #socialanxiety
• music
• spotify