Her Campus Logo Her Campus Logo
placeholder article
placeholder article

How to Cope with Incompatible Roommates

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Cal Poly chapter.

One of the biggest things college women tend to look forward to when starting their freshman year is meeting their roommate(s). Many women look forward to making their roommate(s) part of their regular friend group and perhaps even their best friend! Unfortunately, not all college women are lucky enough to create a “best friendship” with their college roommate(s). For some people, the random assignment just doesn’t match up, or the excitement of the new school year fades away, leaving only tension between everyone. While not getting along with your roommates is definitely a bummer especially when you’re starting college, there are absolutely things that you can do to help ease the tension and cope with an incompatible roommate. 

Communication is key

No matter how difficult things get between you and your roommates, communication is key. Keeping an open line of communication allows you and your roommate(s) to discuss problems and schedules, and talk about issues that may arise during the school year. Communicating with your roommate(s) is a sure-fire way to ensure that a smooth transition even if you don’t get along perfectly.

Set up grounds rules from the beginning

Ground rules are important. It’s a way for you to ensure that everyone knows where each other stands, and helps to calm any potential fights form the beginning. By setting up ground rules, you set yourselves up for success. Plus, it’s a way to get to know each other, learn about each other’s pet peeves, and just generally understand your roommates as people!

Actually follow the ground rules you set

It’s one thing to set ground rules and say you’ll follow them. It’s another thing to actually follow those rules. And while you may disagree with some of the rules your roommate(s) have set, they likely disagree with some of the rules that you set, and compromise is important in a roommate relationship. Even if you disagree or think their rules are dumb, it’s important to adhere to them. It creates a stronger roommate bond, as it shows you respect them and their wishes, and hopefully will make things a bit easier between everyone. 

COMMUNICATION IS KEY

Yes, we are repeating this because it is so. d*mn. important. A majority of roommate problems stem from lack of communication. Be it that they don’t like that you snore, you don’t like that they are messy, or anything in-between, not talking about your issues and letting them stew creates serious problems later on. If problems have been boiling for months between you guys, all it could take is one slip-up for everything between you to blow up. By communicating, you ensure that all problems are resolved swiftly, and hopefully lessens the tensions between you and your roommate(s). 

We won’t sugar coat it. Sometimes having a roommate sucks. But by following this advice and keeping an open line of communication, you can help make your roommate living situation a whole lot easier. 

Her Campus Placeholder Avatar
Jordyn White

Cal Poly '19

3rd year Sociology student at Cal Poly San Luis Obispo. I'm a writer and editor for Her Campus Cal Poly, and I am so excited to be finishing my final year at Cal Poly with Her Campus! I love a good political conversation, so feel free to hit me up if you want to talk politics!