When I planned to write this article it was going to be about toxic friendships and their dangers. I got halfway through when it felt too wrong to continue focusing on the negative aspects of friendships after seeing how powerful and beautiful friendships can be after the recent events of the Borderline shooting and California wildfires.
The morning of the Borderline shooting I woke to many texts and messages asking if I was ok. The night before had been one of the rare nights I decided to go to bed before 11.30 p.m. so when I woke up I had no idea what was happening until I saw the news on my phone after all the messages. In a moment of tragedy and great loss, I had received nothing but love and compassion from good friends, some of whom I haven’t spoken to in a long time, and I know it was the same for many others.
That morning I had two thoughts run around my head:
- The first thought being did any of my friends or acquaintances go and were they ok? As I frantically responded to worried texts I reached out to my friends and checked my social media to see if anyone had posted anything, in particular confirming they were ok.
- My second thought was how heartwarming it was to have so many different people reach out to me and check to see if I was ok, wishing myself and my friends the best and to stay safe. It was such a mixture of people; those I talk to everyday, family, old high school teachers and friends, and even friends from back home as the news had gone international.
You see, it isn’t until a time of crisis or our birthday’s or a special occasion that we truly realize the value of our friendships. When life becomes busy doing our day-to-day things, we can forget all the hours, laughs, and values of our friendships that we have gathered over the years. It’s deeply sad but completely normal and understandable because we can’t contact ALL our friends every day.
As I write this article I feel thankful for my friends (and of course of family); to the ones I don’t talk to very often and to the ones that I do. In the past few days I’ve seen how powerful friendships can be and the importance of them. Not just to have fun during the good times, but also be together during the bad. On Thursday morning I sat in the campus chapel thinking of the nights events and praying for the victims. Whilst there I got to see the power of friendship and love. I watched students comfort one another while they cried, I watched students hug one another, holding someone they love in their arms, taking in the moment with their eyes shut, and I watched students support one another during a difficult, dark time offering an ear to talk to and help.
With Thanksgiving around the corner we will be thinking of everything in our lives that we are thankful for. This Thanksgiving I will be thankful for my friends. To my UK friends if you are reading this I’m sorry we’ve fallen out of contact and that our connections have grown less and less. For anyone who has lived in another country or had long distance friendships they will understand that the more time that passes, the harder it becomes. Not only because we live in very different time zones but we no longer have similar lives and live in the same culture. BUT I know you are still my friends and I still very much think of you as my friends. I know that if I contacted them they would be there for me right away and I would be there for them. I’m looking forward to when we can all hang out together and re-build our connections again. I hope it is soon.
Take a second today to think and be thankful for the friendships you have. To all the good times you are still yet to have together and to all the bad times you will support one another in. Take a moment to reach out to old friends and say hi to see how they are. Check up on current friends. And make time to Facetime friends that aren’t close by.
“Good friends are like stars, you don’t always see them but you know they are there” – Thomas Aquinas
Photo Courtesy of Pixabay