Things that I have learned in the first month of school
Okay, I’m a bit new at this so please bear with me.
Starting my first year of college, I expected to learn a bunch of new things but, to be honest, I haven’t learn as much related to coursework as much as I’ve learned about things about college life in general. So here is a (not) helpful list for my fellow freshman and first years.
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Fucking Vine Culture
I was always a bit slow on the uptake with basically everything to do with social media from the basic of getting an account to the deep culture of the memes and the tweets and the vines. Oh my god, the vines. I really did not think my lack of education in this long dead-not dead form of art was ever going to catch up to me. Boy, was I wrong.
First day of orientation, the student body government introduced themselves by telling us what their favorite vines were. There were six people, I only knew what two of them were talking about. And I’ve never seen the actual vines. The first week of school, I have watched more vine compilation and heard more vine references then I have in the last five years.
Why is this the glue that holds our generation together and why did I have to be left out on it?
2.) I’m scared of the squirrels here
Swear to god, I’ve never had a problem with squirrels before. They’ve always minded their own business and I’ve always minded my own. But the squirrels at Butler are a different breed.
I’m not kidding. One of the professors here is really into squirrels and he confirmed it.
Average squirrel: sees you coming down the sidewalk towards it, usually darts at least a little bit out of the way.
Butler squirrel: Does one of two things. One: continues to aggressively nibble the nut he was already holding or Two: decides to run back and forth on the path.
These squirrels really do not give a shit about you and are very happy in their own little world. Maybe this is a testament of how many times I watched the Willy Wonka movies, but I would not be surprised if a group of them jumped me and then tested to see if I was a bad nut. I am deeply, deeply afraid of them.
3.) Just because you got into college, doesn’t mean you’re smart
Congratulations! You passed all your classes and tests just so you can spend at least four more years doing even harder versions of them! Hooray!
Sadly, I’m here to inform you that all the testing you did, did not make you smart. Maybe intellectually, you’re smart, but god, some college kids have a ways to go before they have any sort of common sense.
I knew this on some level before I came to college but I was not expecting the real intensity of college kid’s stupidity. Just last week, some kids in my hall were playing with a razor at midnight. First off, how? Second off, why?
So be courteous to your fellow students and don’t go yelling through the corridors and kicking walls at one o’clock in the morning. It might be surprising but there might be some people actually trying to sleep. I’m also still waiting for a response from that one guy that slipped notes under all the girls’ doors sometime during the night. Please respond.
4.) There are busy hours in certain places
Just because you go to a small school doesn’t mean that everyone won’t try to cram into one space at one time. So here are some tips:
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During the weekdays, Atherton is super busy from twelve to one. I’m not completely sure but I’m guessing that’s everyone’s break between two classes and they are rushing to get food. If you can, avoid it. Eat at another time. Go eat in ResCo (it’ll get busy but not line is out the door busy). My RA even said that you can request a box lunch if you’re in and you can just pick it up in the morning. Just try to save yourself from being trampled.
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Laundry. Every kid will put this off until it is absolutely necessary but don’t be stupid and get caught in the weekend afternoon bustle in the laundry room. There won’t be enough machines. I waited at least half an hour after my clothes finished in the washer before I could finally claim a dryer. Also, don’t be a douche and not be there during the busiest time of the day when your load is done. I will throw it on top of the machine if it means that I can finish washing my clothes. P.S. I wouldn’t recommend doing your laundry at midnight. It’s very calm and very empty but it’s almost a guarantee that you’re going to make a mistake and forget something.
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For events, just try to get there early. You never know what stuff will be popular and what stuff won’t. Worst thing that’ll happen is that you’ll grab your food and a table first.
5.) Join Clubs!!!!!
Can’t emphasize enough, if you are new to campus, join clubs and activities. They are a great way to make friends and possibly be adopted by senior friends. Then you can get invited to parties. Yes, your roommate is awesome and you guys should definitely become friends but I promise you, you are going to get sick of hanging around them 24/7.
Hope this list was helpful but I know it probably wasn’t.