I’m going to be honest with you because we’re all friends here. I like naps more than I like most people.
This has got to be true for at least a few of you.
I mean seriously, naps are one of the most wonderful things in the world. They’re literally the loves of my life (next to dogs).
Some people shit on naps. I don’t get that, like what’s so terrible about taking a break in the middle of the day to do your favorite activity? NOTHING. My mother is the most anti-nap person in the entire world. In her mind, unless you’re like 3 or 90, you shouldn’t waste your day sleeping.
Woman, if I want to nap, I’m gonna nap! Whatever, I’m fine. It’s fine, I’m over it. It’s fine.
I’ve taken a ton of naps in my day. Like you don’t understand, a shit ton of naps. Sso basically I’m the nap expert, and I’m going to share my most secretive nap secrets on how to take the perfect nap.
So, the first thing you have to do is find the ideal place for your nap. I’ve napped in some pretty weird places, and tbh, sometimes the weirdest places can be the most comfortable.
One time, I napped in the middle of the hallway near my bedroom. I couldn’t tell you why I was on the floor, but I woke up so damn refreshed. It was beautiful.
(Fun fact: this is what I’m assuming I looked like on the floor)
For longer naps, I suggest something a little bit softer, like a couch, or your bed. Big chairs also work well.
Okay, so once you’ve found the ideal napping spot, it’s time to get accesories. I’m talking pillows and blankets ladies, not that statement necklace you wear literally every time you go out.
I like to stick to the 2 to 1 ratio for my nap accessories, two pillows for every blanket. This ratio works out great because if you’re just taking a light afternoon snooze, all you need is a blanket and two pillows. Use the blanket to snuggle yourself in and put one pillow under your head. You’re free to do whatever you please with the second pillow. You’re welcome.
For a longer, more intense sleep, I suggest doubling up on everything. Get yourself four pillows and two blankets. This time around, you’re going to want to arrange the pillows in a sort of way that they’re surrounding your head. Make a little half circle, so that way if you move in your sleep, you won’t accidentally hit your head on the wall (trust me, I’ve learned from experience).
Once you’ve got your little comfy head zone, tuck yourself in with the one blanket more towards your feet and the second one up more on your shoulders. There’s nothing worse than waking up from a solid three hour nap to find that your feet aren’t covered by the blanket and are fucking freezing.
If you’ve only got time for a quick nap and need to set your alarm, be sure to set the tone as something different than the tone that wakes you up in the morning, or else you’ll hear the song you wake up to and freak out because you’ll think it’s like 8am when really it’s like 4:30 and you did not in fact sleep through the entire day (again, learned from experience).
If you’re having trouble falling asleep and you know you only have like 45 minutes to nap, and you’ve already wasted 10 of them stressing because you can’t sleep, put on a documentary about caves in France. It’ll knock you right out, I promise.
Happy napping!