Happy First Day of Pride Month!
By now, I think everyone has heard about the show Heated Rivalry. Based on the book by Rachel Reid, it aired on HBO Max near the end of November in 2025 and quickly gained popularity across many demographics, not just hockey fans and LGBTQ+ supporters. Actors Connor Storrie (Ilys Rosanov) and Hudson Williams (Shane Hollander) were consistently praised for their performances as the two rival hockey stars. At the height of its notoriety, people were referring to it as “that gay hockey show”, but people love this show for much more than just that.Â
Like most queer media, there will be backlash from people who do not support queer people and LGBTQ+ rights. But for people who have actually watched the show, they can say that the show is not just a gay love story, but it is a story about two people who love each other in a world that could not accept them. This is not just about LGBTQ+ relationships, but also people who feel that their love is deemed unacceptable by others. This show is so unapologetically itself, knows the message it wants to send, successfully conveys a plot that will do well in Hollywood, and makes a statement on what popular media can be. Overall, this show and this story has not just entertained that masses, but has touched hearts and become a topic of interest that many people can connect upon, as well, in my opinion, redefined queer existence and popular entertainment.Â
Since the show came out, many people, specifically women, have praised the show for its portrayal of sexual encounters. One of the biggest topics surrounding this show and its fans is many women being confused because they enjoy watching this sexual romance between the two characters, which can leave room for judgment and questioning one’s own sexuality. All over the internet women on platforms like X and TikTok, were speaking up on their opinions about the show, and whether it is wrong for them to enjoy it. While unfortunately there is a collection of people who fetishize gay men and their relationships, I think that the women who are coming forward about their admiration for the show, seem not to understand that most likely it is not to do with a fetish or sexual interest, but a lack of empowerment of women’s sexuality in the media.Â
Sex in the media has historically been portrayed heterosexually, and only in recent years have we really seen an increase in positive homosexual relationships in TV and movies. Shows like Heartstopper recently have gained popularity due to just that. And not only has sex in TV and film been strictly shown heterosexually, but there is also this underlying message about power and gender, and when studied, I think it makes a very interesting statement on patriarchal pressures from society.Â
Typically in sex scenes in movies or shows, there is a power dynamic between the man and the woman. Many articles that have examined problems with sex in the media consistently highlight issues like how it sets unrealistic relationship standards, has negative impacts on body image, and the biggest point of all is the lack of safe sex conversations portrayed. This point brings me to my overall argument of why women seem to love heated rivalry. In the show Shane and Ilya’s sexual encounters have very clear verbal consent, communication, and ,in my opinion, was incredibly well directed. I will praise the director and intimacy coordinator of this show highly for portraying mutual and respectful sex. Not to say that all sex in the media is doing a bad job of showing consent, but I think that it is incredibly important for people to see consent shown in TV and film, because, unfortunately, we live in an era where asking for verbal consent is not typically normalized, and sets a bad view of sex for adolescence.Â
 When women see these sexual scenes in the show, occasionally they are left with the thought of “I enjoy this so I must be gay”. Those two ideas do not go hand-in-hand whatsoever. While sexuality is fluid and can change as time goes on, I believe that the bigger idea is that women just want to see themselves respected sexually in the media. When you have these two male characters being shown respectfully in a sexual manner, it raises the question of “why can we not have this not just for heterosexual sex in TV and film, but for women overall in this form of media?” I think that this conversation really makes a statement on patriarchal persuasion in our society, and how we have to be making an effort to be portraying women respectfully in entertainment.Â