It’s easy to get wrapped up in the endless excitement of technology; sending weekly school emails from the comfort of your dorm, catching up with high school friends through social networking and constantly texting on your cell phone, no matter where you are. But when do all of these technological advancements become a means to avoid what is happening in your life, right here, right now?
As technology becomes more and more advanced, the idea of talking face-to-face becomes less popular. Why hang out with your boyfriend when you can just Skype him, right? I won’t argue that video chatting and Facebook make it a lot easier to stay in relationships long distance, but can they really replace the experience of physically being with your boyfriend?
As collegiates, we are constantly on the run, moving from one activity or class to the next. It’s easier just to send a text to the guy you’re into, rather than catch up over dinner. It’s also less awkward. Why is it that we are bolder or less afraid of speaking our minds when we communicate through technology than when we are face-to-face? Don’t hide behind your cell phone or Facebook messaging; get out there and ask that guy to dinner or to hang out. As Joe* says, “Girls who actually have the courage to ask me out in person or who are not afraid to talk to me in the library are the girls worth pursuing in my eyes.”
There is no way to start or maintain a relationship purely through social media. It’s so easy for relationships to fall apart over text because your guy could take what you say the wrong way. Don’t take that chance; tell him you like him in person. There is no way to explore a truly emotionally close relationship, and more importantly physically intimate relationship, with someone over a text message. This is just another reason why online relationships never work out. I know you have all seen Catfish. That T.V. show alone should scare you into talking and building a relationship in person!
Don’t be afraid to be yourself and be out there. If a guy can’t communicate in any way besides text or doesn’t try to hang out with you face-to-face, he isn’t worth your time. Find the guy who hasn’t given up on getting to know you beyond the Internet, and don’t use texting as an excuse to say something or not act on your feelings!
Although technology has helped us in so many ways, it can never replace face-to-face communication. Talking to a guy via text, Facebook chat or through any other device is a recipe for confusion, mixed messages and over-analyzing the situation. So many things can be cleared up and avoided when they are dealt with in person. Life is a series of awkward conversations and situations, and the only way we can learn from these is by conquering them. Texting to fix a problem ultimately makes things more awkward because when you finally see the person on the other end of the conversation, there is nothing more to be said; it has all been typed. But the problem hasn’t really been dealt with.
The lifestyle most of us choose to lead goes a little something like this: You hook-up with a guy over the weekend. Maybe something doesn’t go quite right, or maybe you catch him with another girl the next night. He texts you or you text him. Things seem ok, but then on Sunday when you see him from across the library, you bolt the other way hoping you didn’t catch his eye. In-person communication has been avoided and now you feel more awkward than you did before.
Although it can seem painful to talk to a guy in person, or even more, to text and ask that you speak in person, it will make everything better in the end. You’ll leave that face-to-face conversation feeling more confident and content that everything is as it should be. And then next time you see this special someone working in the library, you won’t be afraid to pass by, wave hello or even start up a conversation.