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Calling All Women: Stop Apologizing

In 2014, Pantene came out with an ad that will blow your mind.  Have you ever stopped to think about how frequently we, as women, apologize for things we shouldn’t? According to a study from 2010 by Psychological Science, “women have a lower threshold for what constitutes offensive behavior,” so we find ourselves apologizing for anything and everything. From something as simple as asking your waiter for the water they keep forgetting to bring you, to respectfully trying to add your opinion into a conversation: women often have a toxic tendency to submit to those around us when moments get a little uncomfortable.

After watching this ad, my eyes were opened to the countless times I’ve found myself saying “sorry” when it is completely unnecessary. The worst part is that when I ask myself if a man would apologize if he were in my same position, the answer is almost always no. If a crowd of boys tries to push by me at a party, I almost immediately jump out of the way with an “oh, sorry.” But, if the situation were reversed, if the boys do even move out of the way, to hear a “sorry” muddled from them would be as rare as keeping the same “fracket” for an entire winter season.

I’m not saying that we as women should never apologize, but only when merited! Constantly apologizing in moments when you are not at fault allows whoever should be apologizing to be cleared from that responsibility. Especially when it comes to guys, women tend to fear of the stereotypical label of being overly aggressive or “dramatic,” so we may compensate by apologizing when we know damn well that we shouldn’t be. But that stops now. Do not be afraid to stand up for yourself and do not apologize for other people’s mistakes. So go out, be you, and never be sorry about it.

Lily is a first- year student at Bucknell University, from Baltimore, MD. She is the youngest of three children, with two older brothers who live in New York and Boston. She has two dogs, Cooper and Nellie, and if you meet her in person she has probably already shown you the thousands of pictures she has of them on her phone. Lily loves to sing and play guitar, is passionate about fashion and beauty, and is so excited to be a HerCampus writer for Bucknell!
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