As a little girl, I drew hearts along the margins of my notebooks daydreaming about when my one true love would sweep me off my feet and whisk me away to a world of romance. Early mornings spent begging one another to stay for just 5 more minutes, late afternoons playing phone tag for dinner plans, and evenings spent settling for pizzas because we burnt the home-cooked meal. Romance, or therefore the lack of romance, has been the thorn amongst the roses of my womanhood. How could I be 20-something, all alone still? And you may be sitting here this fine Friday evening wondering the same thing about yourself. In that case, I’ve got the best valentines you could ever ask for…here is my rendition of a 20-something-year-old’s Guide to Conquering V-Day!
I may not have advice on how to score a date…, but I do have a 4-point program on how to entertain yourself while the lovebirds take to the skies. Lock your doors, turn down the lights, and get ready for a wonderful night alone!
- Sex & the City
- While most people will be reigning in dear old Saint Valentine’s holy hours with a buttload of bacchanalia, that doesn’t mean singles can’t join in! I think one of the most picturesque ways of celebrating valentine’s day is watching Carrie and her friends galavant around New York City in their most stylish outfits while talking about their ‘haps’ and ‘mishaps’ with men. As a 20-something-year-old, I can say I’ve learned the most valuable lessons about men from watching that show, the primary one being that they’re a joke.
- 13 Going on 30
- We may not be thirty, flirty, and thriving… yet, but that doesn’t mean we can’t appreciate Jenna’s misadventures of teenagehood to middle-aged hood? (If that’s a word). Watching Jenna flip flop through the trials and tribulations of womanhood and not only falling in love with the cutest boy next door, Matty, but falling in love with herself and her life is sure to make you feel some Valentine magic. Not to mention this movie is quite literally a little girl’s dream come true, so rewatching as a 20-something-year-old will make your heart go pitter-patter and the little girl buried inside of you jump for joy. And what could be more lovely than that? Surely not some date.
- The Devil Wears Prada
- This recommendation is for my girls who are married to their jobs. As a fashionista working overtime and a full-time workaholic, this film is a personal favorite of mine. Although this wouldn’t traditionally fit into the romance category, as a fashion lover, I beg to differ. The Devil Wears Prada shows the ways a woman can love herself and invest in herself, even when those around her do not believe in her. It is the ultimate self-love movie, and Andy’s self-love is tracked through her outfits. As she becomes more confident in herself, her outfits become exponentially better and more expensive (shout out to the Costume designer, Patricia Field, who is also behind the jaw-dropping looks on HBO’s Sex and the City). The hardest thing for Andy to do was walk away from the work that she loved because it was negatively impacting her personal life. Following this, Andy pursues her dream career as a writer, while still holding onto the memories (and clothes) she got from Vogue. That’s a girlboss if I’ve ever seen one.
- Insecure
- You know I couldn’t end this list without dropping something from Issa Rae. Insecure is a Black girl’s holy grail of navigating adulthood. There’s some good and some bad… and also some really bad, but all in all we are taken on a journey of appreciating the seeds of love planted in our friendships, ourselves, and our community. When, and if there’s time, we may also find ourselves stumbling into love with romantic partners. I remember watching Insecure at a point in my life when I needed direction and answers to unanswerable questions. Joining Issa’s squad with Molly, Kelli, and Tiffany made me feel less alone on my journey through womanhood in this very white world of Bucknell. I learned to love myself for the good, the bad, and the ugly, ultimately realizing that I’m beautiful with all of my imperfections and what makes me amazing is that I keep trying to be better day by day.
As you trickle down this list and find your bed littered with tissue boxes, ice cream cartons, or cookie trays, just remember that love comes in many forms and that romance isn’t an end-all component of Valentine’s Day. Call some friends up for a Galentine’s Day. Call your parents and tell them you love them. Get dolled up and take yourself out to a nice dinner. Or, stay in and watch your comfort show/ movie. Each one of these acts is a practice of love and it’s a privilege to know love in all of her wonderful ways.
But you know, don’t take what I said too literally, I’m just me, Miss 20-something.
P.S., thank you to SZA for the perfect writing gimmick for this article.