In college, who has the time, patience, and energy to maintain a long-distance relationship, unless that relationship has the potential to end in marriage? For the select few collegiettes dating lovers from afar, don’t worry – following the guidelines below can help you master the skill that is the LDR.
1. Be You-tiful. In order for you to grow as a person and keep your sanity, you must (must, must, must) know how to be happy as an individual. Learn to love and be comfortable with yourself so you can develop personally and as a couple.
2. Keep It Real-istic. In order for a long-distance relationship to be successful, you and your significant other must set realistic expectations for each other and for the relationship itself. Make promises you know you can keep, like calling each other every night before going to sleep.
3. It’s Not Always “All Smiles.” Accept that there will be tears—sometimes many, many tears—but as long as the smiles outweigh the tears, remind yourself that your relationship is worth it. Remember that all relationships, near or far, come with obstacles.
4. Honesty Is (Really) the Best Policy. Never shy away from communicating your concerns, fears, wants, and needs to your significant other (and to yourself!). Two people’s feelings must be considered in a relationship. If you aren’t ready for the level of commitment that comes with an LDR, proceed with caution.
5. Trust Is a Must. No healthy relationship can grow on insecurity or mistrust. Your significant other may never find out if you fool around with someone else, but that doesn’t mean you should test these waters. Consider how you would feel if he or she was doing the same.
6. Sacrifice Your Life for A Hubby or A Wife? If you aren’t at least 99% sure that you want to fight for and commit to the relationship, you shouldn’t give up all the fun college has to offer. You should find the sacrifices you make for the relationship to be reasonable and fair.
7. ‘Picture Perfect’ Big Picture. Always think “big picture” when it comes to a long-distance relationship. Little acts of adoration go a long way. Even simply leaving a “good-night voicemail” or text for your significant other will leave him or her thinking about you all the next day.
8. Baby Kiss Me Through the Phone. Aside from its obvious use as tool to converse with your significant other, video chat can also be used to stimulate your relationship via Skype-sex. Believe it or not, Skype-sex can be a fun and useful tool to get you off, and it’s a healthy way to keep that spark alive even from hundreds of miles away.
9. Can’t Touch This. It should be abundantly clear that you are in a relationship by your actions, your body language, your social interactions, and, of course, your Facebook status. You certainly shouldn’t be looking around, either – looking leads to lusting, lusting leads to touching, and touching anyone besides yourself or your significant other is inappropriate when you are in a relationship (of any distance).
10. Just Your Luck. Long-distance relationships are hard, and they can bring on some serious FOMO. Fortunately, you aren’t alone in this struggle – many other collegiettes deal with the same feelings as you. You may feel lonely in the basement of a frat house, but you always have someone to call at the end of the night. It’s important to remember that long-distance isn’t forever, so when it’s done with the right person, the stress of making it work becomes worthwhile.