I want to start by saying that I may not be qualified to write this. From the title, you may be expecting a relationship expert, but I’m just a 19-year-old figuring it out as I go. Most of my relationships have been short-lived and childish— the bar is pretty low for high school dating. But one of them was actually quite serious with over two years together, during which I learned so much about relationships and about myself. And, since the special day is coming soon, I figured why not help my girlies out? So here it is, relationship advice from someone who may or may not know *wtf* she’s doing.<3
- Talk about anything and everything
Your significant other should be like a best friend—someone you can laugh with, pour your heart out with, or talk about the tiniest, most insignificant parts of your day with. Even if you think something is too small to share, like your thoughts on a Starbucks drink you got, it’s really not. After all, details say a lot about a person. On the other hand, being vulnerable and sharing personal parts of yourself can seem daunting. But I’d say that vulnerability is actually one of the biggest indicators of a healthy relationship. It’s a sign that you genuinely trust and feel comfortable with your partner in the first place. By talking about everything from your favorite hobbies, your biggest fears, or your craziest secrets, you build a stronger bond with that special someone. This will only work, however, if the other person reciprocates by being vulnerable, receptive, and trustworthy themselves.
- Go on creative, exciting adventures
Having fun together and making memories is the bulk of any relationship. So, go out and be spontaneous. Introduce them to your hobbies and immerse yourself in theirs. Go on a road trip or try a new cuisine together. Planning dates that are unique, exciting, and creative can make any relationship more dynamic. Yes, this can be hard when you’re swamped with school, work, or other commitments. But make sure to plan ahead and set some time out of your week to do something fun with your partner, no matter how big or small it might be. Can you tell that quality time is my love language?
- Be resilient
You might hear this one all the time, but it’s very true. There will be days where you two argue and cannot stand one another. There will be days where you are upset. During these times, you need to remind yourself that bad days are completely normal (and healthy). Relationships take effort, and not all days are going to be perfect. By communicating effectively, being empathetic, and working together, you will overcome it. Remember, it’s you two versus the problem, not you versus your partner.
Whether you’re a single queen, in a committed relationship, or anywhere in the middle, I hope this Valentine’s Day is your best one yet!