With Valentine’s Day just passing, I’ve compiled a series of tricks (that are psychologically-backed) to help you attract a lover! Obviously, you can’t force someone to like you, but it is possible to encourage them to like you. Try working some magic with these 11 tricks and who knows… maybe this year around you won’t be watching Netflix and drowning yourself in chocolates, but instead going out with the person of your dreams!
1. Wear red.
Red is associated with sexual energy and action. Several psychological studies have discovered people are more likely to be interested in people who wear the color. Who knew getting someone to be attracted to you could turn out as easy as putting on your clothes in the morning!
2. Say their name.
Repeating someone’s name is a quick and easy way to foster attraction! It makes people feel like they have a personal attraction to you. Try using phrases such as “So, Jake, how have you been lately?” or “I’m very impressed with how you handled that, Audrey.” When used diligently, it can produce chills and send shivers up someone’s spine. Plus, people who do this are often described as charismatic!
3. Copy them.
This trick is based on mirroring—or as psychologists like to call it, the “chameleon effect.” When people unconsciously mimic each other’s behavior, the mimicry triggers attraction. Copy their body language, gestures and facial expressions (but not too excessively for them to notice). If they cross their legs, cross yours. If they drink some water, drink some water also. The effects are quite astounding.
4. Play hard to get (but be easy first).
Playing hard to get is an art. When you pull it off correctly, it can really draw people in. The trick is to begin with what psychologists call the mere exposure effect. Several studies show that repeated exposure to any stimulus makes us like it more (unless the initial reaction is negative). So, for the trick to work, don’t be hard to get in the beginning…you’ll come off as arrogant and cold. Once you’ve created a pleasant bond and interaction, eventually start seeing them less and less. This is based on the Scarcity Principle that states people value and furthermore desire something more when its rare or difficult to obtain. Be a diamond in a world full of stones, my friends.
5. Be humorous.
The humor effect is a psychological phenomenon that says you’ll be more prone to be remembered when you’re funny! Humor helps takes away negative thoughts and can even make others feel more comfortable. Telling a funny story, especially paired with vulnerability, will increase your attractiveness tenfold!
6. Hang in a group.
The “Cheerleader Effect” is yet another psychological phenomenon that attracts people. According to research, people are considered to be more attractive when they are observed in a group. This is because the scale at which one determines the attractiveness of an individual is skewed when surrounded by others. Neil Patrick Harris in the famous TV show, How I Met Your Mother, demonstrates this phenomenon when referring to a group of people in a bar as collectively attractive. He then followed by saying individually, they were all less attractive to him.
7. Be clumsy.
Sometimes being clumsy can lead to love. It’s true and you’ve probably seen it often depicted in movies…when a girl suddenly drops an armful of books and a handsome boy appears out of the blue to aid her. This psychological effect is called the “Identifiable Victim Effect” which refers to the tendency of individuals to offer aid when a specific identifiable person —the victim— is observed alone under a hardship. Revealing that you aren’t perfect makes you seem more relatable and vulnerable to others.
8. Radiate confidence.
Confidence is a major key in attracting people. Being confident makes you stand out. Being self-assured intrigues people and makes them want to get to know you so they can eventually feel the same. The best way to become confident is to master a skill or find some action that makes you feel good about yourself. Find your passion and pursue it and then people will naturally want to pursue you!
9. Boost adrenaline together.
Research has shown that when adrenaline-boosting activities, like riding roller coasters and skydiving, are done with another person, you can trick such person into enjoying your company. See, these activities release adrenaline, giving people a form of natural high. They will associate the good feeling from the natural high with the person they experienced it with. Thus, they will want to spend more time with the person they produced the high with.
10. Coffee instead of ice cream dates.
People tend to associate temperature with the personality of the person they’re with. Studies have shown people with cold drinks are more so perceived to have cold personalities and visa versa. If they’re holding a hot drink, like coffee, they perceive the personality of the person they’re with to be warm and kind. So, try ditching the ice cream cones and go for a toasty date at café nearby!
According to the phenomenon, spontaneous trait transference, people associate adjectives you use to describe other people with your personality. If you describe someone as sweet and caring, they will associate you with these qualities. The reverse stands true if you’re talking smack. So, when you gossip, do it positively and you’ll be more attractive!
Work your magic with these tricks and you’ll come to enchant someone in less than no time!