Her Campus Logo Her Campus Logo
placeholder article
placeholder article

Call me ‘Them’: Being Agender at Brenau

Her Campus Placeholder Avatar
Anonymous Author Student Contributor, Brenau University
Kenya Hunter Student Contributor, Brenau University
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Brenau chapter and does not reflect the views of Her Campus.

About a week or so ago, my mom visited me here at Brenau. While she was here, we had a dinner conversation about sexuality and gender and brought up how she raised me and my sister.

ā€œWhen you two were little, I never really put too much of an emphasis on you two to be ā€˜girly’ or act like ā€˜little girls’. You played with a mix of boy and girl toys, and your activities were pretty gender neutral too,” she said.

It was that observation that had me thinking about my sister andĀ IĀ and about the assumptions people make about gender identity and sexual orientation. Here we were, two kids assigned female at birth; we were raised the exact same way, fed the same meals, sent to the same schools, and loved equally as much by all of our family members.

And yet, we are so different. My sister is a cisgender woman, and I’m agender.

I didn’t choose to be agender anymore than my sister decided to be cisgender. Ā Many people think that gender identity and sexual orientation are things that we choose in life, but to be perfectly honest, if I had the option to be happy with my assigned gender, I would.
I’ve struggled with my gender identity since I was 15 years old.Ā I’ve never felt comfortable being categorized as either male nor female. I honestly cringe every time I have to mark ā€œfemaleā€ as my gender on any form that doesn’t offer a ā€œprefer not to answerā€ or ā€œotherā€ option. It makes me so uncomfortable when people make comments about my breasts and how blessed I should feel for being ā€œwell endowedā€.
Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy doing traditionally feminine things. I’m in a sorority, and I’m currently that sorority’s philanthropy coordinator; I love doing my makeup and I occasionally enjoy wearing skirts and dresses (sometimes it makes me uncomfortable though). However, I don’t see why doing things that are traditionally masculine or feminine makes me more or less like one gender or the other. I see things like that as being things anyone of any gender identity can enjoy.Ā 
Plus, I believe that gender expression is fluid and depends on the person.

But this is who I am. I can’t change how I identify anymore than I can change the color of my eyes or who I’m sexually attracted to. While there are people who don’t understand, there are many who love me just the same.

Now, that’s all fine and well. But how has that affected my life at Brenau?Ā 

Surprisingly enough, being at a women’s college actually helped me confirm my gender identity. At home, I’m not entirely out to my family, so coming to college was my chance to be more open about it. Even in my sorority life, I still feel comfortable expressing my gender identity without hesitation.Ā I’ve also gotten a lot of support from my circle of friends, and they continue to support me.

Going to the bathroom can be an issue, considering Brenau only has male and female facilities so far, and I haven’t officially come out and told the school ā€œHey, I’m agender!”

The dating game is also very slim at Brenau. It’s a bit difficult explaining to each and every person you want to date that you’re actually really uncomfortable with conpliments like “You’re pretty,” Ā andĀ commenting on your ā€œnice boobs.” I had one Tinder match say I was being unreasonable for not wanting to be called pretty. My longest relationship has been with my sorority and my ukulele.Ā I don’t really mind it though, I’m not the biggest fan of relationships anyway.

Right now, any and all transition that I would like to do will happen after I graduate. Since I’m considering Hormone Replacement Therapy, it might make staying at Brenau and staying in my sorority complicated, so I plan to wait. Slowly but surely, however, I’m starting to tell people to call me by ā€œthey/themā€ pronouns, and the more people I tell, the more support I find.

Being agender has its ups and downs, but it isn’t terrible. I love myself a lot more now that I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m agender. I can’t wait until we reach a time where everyone is comfortable enough t be themselves without fear of death, ridicule or harm, and I fight for that future every day.
Until then, call me ā€œthem.”
Ā 
Ā 
Ā 
Ā 
Ā 
Ā 

Ā 

My name is Kenya Hunter! I am a freshman at Brenau University as a Mass Communications major. My focus is journalism!