Here at BC, dating is notorious for simply not happening. The hook-up scene, which many of us have been educated about through Professor Kerry Cronin, is and seemingly will always be all the rage. Are we scared of commitment? Is hooking up just more fun than dating? Who is at fault for the lack of dating culture anyway? Should we ladies step up our game and start asking the guys out ourselves?
Regardless of what or who is at fault for the lack of relationships on campus, it is undeniable that couples are not as prominent as one may expect them to be, especially in a place where hormones are raging. Side note: After reading this article, you will probably go outside and suddenly notice every couple in existence at BC. Because that is just how life works.
Every time I visit home, my mom manages to sneak in every single girl’s favorite inquiries: Do you have your eye on anyone? Does anyone like you? How is the dating scene at school? Have you ever even had a boyfriend (thanks, Mom)? Her incessant curiosity about my love life sometimes gets me wondering about it myself. Why don’t I have a boyfriend? Is there something wrong with me? I definitely ate too much froyo the other night in front of those guys from Walsh 3rd floor. Maybe it was that time at the Plex when my butt sweat was simply uncontrollable. But am I really to be blamed or judged if my sweat always sneaks its way down my back and onto the Plex mats? Or do guys think I’m weird for smearing peanut butter on every food that enters my mouth?
Girls, it’s time to stop thinking about the reasons why a guy might not like you. Remind yourself of why you are undeniably one of the most datable, if not the only dateable girl at BC. Here are a few reasons why I think I would be the perfect girlfriend. Sorry, but I am definitely not sorry.
- I am not even ugly. In fact, I think I am pretty. I am attractive and guys should realize it and act now before my frown lines start setting in. I take good care of myself, visit the Plex every day, and shower. Okay, maybe I don’t shave my legs every day. Or every week. But hey, something’s got to give. I am a beautiful young woman and every single one of you boys should realize that.
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I am not that annoying. Okay, sometimes I complain about my workload or the pimple that has been plaguing me for days. But for the most part, I am pretty chill. If we were dating, I would let you do what you wanted and would not text you every six minutes. I do not have the time or the energy for that. I wouldn’t demand too much of your time or all of your attention. I just want a little cuddle action and for you to text me if I am having a bad day. Is that too much to ask?
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I would let you hang out with your friends. I do not wish to partake in the pseudo-married couple phenomenon that sometimes seems to be sweeping campus. I want to hang out with my friends and you should hang out with yours. I won’t barge in when you and your guys are watching the Bruins while downing beers and eating pizza. In fact, I encourage you to take part in this social gathering. Here’s an idea: Our friends could all hang out together! I would not be opposed to an off campus party that brings together two great groups of people.
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I am not that crazy. I will not show up to your room at 3 a.m. screaming at you for no apparent reason. I won’t flip out if you forget to buy me an apple at Lower after I asked you to. I have no interest in making up excuses to fight with you. I do not want to confuse you. In fact, I think it would be best if we were on the same page most of the time. I won’t bug out if I see you talking to another girl. You are allowed to have lady friends. If you were friends with only guys, that would be kind of weird.
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My family is fun to hang out with. Do not be scared of my dad, he just wants to protect me! Once you get to know him, you will likely be friends. My mom wants to know everything about you because that’s just how moms are. My siblings are actually awesome. If I invited you to dinner with us, you would probably enjoy it. And if we were to spend a weekend at my house, you might want to stay there forever.
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I appreciate a good sporting event. I am not saying that I need courtside tickets to the Celtics-Heat game. But if you took a little time to explain the sport to me, we could have a lot of fun at a game! Who doesn’t enjoy some greasy stadium food and cheering alongside passionate fans for a night? I will not ask you dumb questions the entire game because we both know that I won’t remember your answers in 2 hours. I just want to have fun with you!
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I put a general effort into my appearance on a (fairly) daily basis. Granted, we all have those days when all we can muster the energy for are sweats and Uggs. But I want to look pretty for you! I understand that you don’t want to be walking through the quad with a glamazon. However, a glamazon I am not. But I can put together one heck of a jeans, top, and boots outfit! Don’t you want your friends to be a little jealous that your girlfriend looks pretty good?
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I don’t expect you to pay for everything. Hey, this is college. None of us have a bottomless piggybank to pull from. I am happy to split bills and treat you every once in a while. I don’t need to go to the North End for dinner and dessert. Do you know how bad I would feel making you spend that much to begin with? Coolidge Corner is fine with me. And a little take out never hurt nobody. You can buy the drinks; I’ll cover the Lo Mein.
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I can cook for you. If one of us is fortunate enough to have a kitchen, I am happy to whip up a meal for the two of us or for you and your roommates! I enjoy cooking and find it quite therapeutic. Nothing would make me happier than to make you something that you love! Consider it a labor of my love. But I might ask you to clean the dishes.
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I am self-sufficient. I do not plan to depend on you for everything now or in the future. I don’t want you to do everything for me. I enjoy my time alone now and then. I like a night spent by myself in a coffee shop off campus. I can solve most, if not all, of my own problems.
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I do not expect you to marry me. We are only in college; marriage isn’t exactly my main concern. We both want to experiment to find out what kinds of people we are compatible with. I understand that this relationship may not be my last. I do not expect a ring from you any time soon.
Here are a few obvious reasons why I am definitely dateable: I can text. I can use a computer. I don’t trip down stairs very often. I don’t get nosebleeds on a daily basis. I know what is going on in the world. I have never killed a man. I am not a cannibal. I like drama about as much as you do. I like kids. And dogs. I don’t eat glue. My room is clean(ish). I wear weather-appropriate clothing. I am not that annoying girl in class who bothers the teacher to give her one more point on the quiz that is only 4% of her grade. I have no interest in burning any of your possessions. Now or if we break up. I promise. I will listen to you when you talk. I am kind. I am smart. I am important.
For the girls reading this article, I hope it is a good reminder of why you are so wonderful. Sure, we all have our flaws. But for the most part, we’re pretty great. Remind yourself of that every day! And for the gentlemen glancing at this list, I encourage you to talk to that girl who was on your Appa trip who you quickly developed a crush on. Tell the girl in front of you in line at the O’Neill printers that you think she is really pretty. It will likely make her day. Ask the girl in your Philosophy class out to coffee. Take a moment to realize how great we are and what wonderful friends or girlfriends we could be.
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