Amidst the Organic Chemistry homework and keeping up with social appearances, I felt my mental health begin to spiral. My life objective became checking off a bunch of unchecked boxes on my to-do list. A list – what I once thought was helpful to organize my life – was just a motor to keep me going and give my day purpose.
While I thought I was the only one on this lonely, repetitive journey, I was quick to realize that was far from the truth. As I sat in the quiet Monarch coffee shop on a Friday evening, my best friend gazed at her unchecked boxes, and the girl across the room contentedly crossed an item off her list, as if it was a grocery list.
I hoped that seeing others in the same position would give me pleasure, but it just made the situation worse. We sat here like clockwork adding things to the list absentmindedly. Items that did not make us smile or make us enjoy life, rather items that added stress and created anxiety. I imagined this was how Alice felt when falling down the rabbit hole – an endless fall with no escape.
I needed to break this cycle. I needed to break the trap created by the list. I needed to not be thinking about if I was staying at the same coffee shop or moving to a different one after the two-hour parking was up. I needed something to smile about, and not a smile that was covering up the extreme stress I was pushing to the back of my mind. I needed to do something for me.
So, there I was, in the same coffee shop on a Friday night scrolling through JetBlue’s website. It was time to hit the reset button, to clear my mind and do something enjoyable, for once. Next thing I knew, I was in the Birmingham Airport on a $70 roundtrip back home- my safe haven (Note: I got a Covid-19 test thanks to UA’s Sentinel Screening).
Yes, I understand what you may think, I’m running away from my problems. But let’s get one thing straight: I don’t run, it would be more of a brisk walk, but it’s definitely not a run. Secondly, thanks to my sticky note on my laptop, I am well aware of the unchecked boxes. This was more of a mental health break and was the best decision I made all semester.
I’m here to say you deserve a break just as much as the next person. Life gets hard. So, taking a break is necessary to take a step back and observe the track your life is following, reflect, and more importantly, just breathe.
Don’t let the unchecked boxes rule your life. So, take the afternoon off. Lay out on the Quad or get lunch with friends, read a book or go for a hike. If it’s feasible and safe to travel – tickets to many destinations are inexpensive at the moment – take a weekend for yourself. Do what makes you happy, and remember everything will be OK.