2025 will be my year… I say for the fifth year in a row. Somehow, we’re already almost a quarter into 2025, and I have a funny feeling that the January bliss of making vision boards, “My Best Self” checklists, and having 50 goals mapped out with a perfect plan to achieve them is long gone. If your rebrand plans have quietly slid onto the back burner, you’re not alone. Actually, you’re in the majority. Research from MSU Denver found that of the 40% of Americans who make resolutions, roughly 90% fail by the second week of February. Yikes. Success rates that low suggest there’s a bigger issue at play- one that goes beyond simply “trying harder.” In college, it’s normal to feel like you’re always in competition, especially with the pressure to maintain a perfect social life, have a foolproof 5-year-plan, yet still make time for you. It’s easier than ever to look at your progress, no matter how big or small, and feel like you’re miles behind everyone else. *Spoiler alert: you’re not*
No, it’s not you. The way we approach resolutions is often wildly unrealistic and ignores how our brains actually work. So if you’ve ever found yourself giving up on your goals by February (same, by the way), that doesn’t mean you lack willpower or discipline- it just means you’re human. We know that knowledge is power, so when you’re overwhelmed by Instagram comparisons and the endless opinions of strangers on the internet, the best thing you can do is look at the facts. Because let’s be real, if motivation alone worked, I wouldn’t have 37 half-finished projects collecting dust in my Notes app.
So let’s do this the right way. With true data analysis, realistic methods, and the insight of professionals, I’m here to help you make changes that stick- without the guilt, the pressure, or the naive all-or-nothing mindset.
WHY WE MAKE RESOLUTIONS
At its core, the practice of using the new year as a time for reflection and change isn’t inherently negative. In fact, with a healthy perspective, resolutions can be a powerful tool for self-improvement- after all, that’s what they were always meant to be. Mini history moment: The tradition of making New Year’s resolutions dates back 4,000 years to the ancient Babylonians, who made promises to their gods in hopes of securing a good year ahead. Later, the Romans honored Janus, the god of beginnings, by dedicating Dec. 3 to reflecting on the past and setting intentions for the future. This tradition resonated so deeply that it’s still ingrained in cultures today- but as humans have evolved, the way we approach resolutions has strayed far from its original purpose.
That said, this tradition stuck around for a reason. We love the idea of a fresh start. We love the feeling of possibility that comes with a new year and the belief that this time, we can finally become the best version of ourselves. Psychologically, research shows that setting and pursuing goals activates the brain’s reward system by releasing dopamine, the neurotransmitter responsible for pleasure and motivation. This dopamine rush makes us feel amazing and reinforces goal-directed behavior, making us even more motivated to chase our dreams. The act of planning resolutions makes us feel like we’re taking charge of our lives- like this time, we’re actually going to stick to them.
But there’s a pretty big catch: dopamine levels drop rapidly once you start putting in the work. The excitement of making a vision board? That’s the dopamine talking. It’s fun because it makes the future feel limitless. But when you actually start working toward the life you just designed, dopamine plummets, and suddenly, the future is terrifying. This is where most people hit a wall because when the motivation fades, it’s easy to assume that you failed and there’s no point in trying anymore. But really, your brain is just doing what it does best: trying to keep you comfortable.
WHY THEY FAIL
The common rhetoric that somehow flipping the calendar means flipping a switch and becoming a whole new person overnight perpetuates the sense of failure that comes from inevitably not meeting every unrealistic expectation you set for yourself. The pressure to be outrageously productive, to glow up, to suddenly become the best version of yourself is a recipe for burnout. While the New Year is undoubtedly a powerful symbol of fresh starts, resolution culture can repeatedly set you up for failure before you even begin.
The dopamine drop is no joke but the external factors are just as significant. Such as the comparison trap every college student knows all too well. We’ve all been here: Laying down, scrolling through Tik Tok and come across a “Day in the Life” video of a girl who somehow seems to get more done in a day than you could in a week and just like that, you’re in the comparison trap. I know it’s easier said than done, but never stop reminding yourself that these videos don’t show the full story, and setting goals based on someone else’s curated content will never bring fulfillment. Is that person
really that productive everyday? Maybe. Maybe not. It doesn’t change anything because it’s not your life. And since we never know the full story, we can never truly wish for the life of someone on social media because we don’t actually know them. True goals should resonate with your personal values and aspirations, not be a reflection of someone else’s life.
Adding fuel to the comparison fire is the rise of “Hustle Culture,” which glorifies overworking and equates rest with laziness. This radicalized mindset is often unsustainable and can lead to burnout. As Dr. Aditi Nerurkar points out, “One of the biggest myths is that you are meant to be functioning at a high capacity without any need for rest or recovery. That productivity is linear. The more you do, the more you can accomplish.” This false notion that you can always do more is what causes the shame and guilt of not reaching unreasonable goals. Lastly, the power of self-talk plays a major role. We all tell ourselves stories about who we are and what we’re capable of. If you’ve convinced yourself that you’re “not a morning person,” (me neither) it’s easy to feel like you’ll never be able to change. But no one gave you that label except for yourself. We get so comfortable in our familiar routines that we forget how capable we are of change. Instead of saying “I can’t wake up that early”, try to align your intentions with the new version of yourself that you want to be. For example, “I am the kind of person who will always get up”. Act like that person and allow it to feel unnatural. Slowly but surely, you’ll start believing in yourself until it is your new reality.
WHAT NOW?
So we’ve unpacked why New Year’s resolutions often die out and how our brains play a tricky role in that. But what are we supposed to do about it? We’ve all heard it: Just don’t give up! You have to want it badly enough! Buy a cute planner, and you’ll be a whole new person! But if any of that actually worked, we wouldn’t be having this conversation. And trust me, as a serial planner hoarder, I get it. But lucky for us, we know better. So using what we’ve learned, it’s time for the best part- making habits that stick. Anytime of the year.
Start Small. Ever tried to rewire your entire routine overnight? Yeah, me too. We both know it doesn’t work. Our brains thrive on small, manageable changes. Habit expert James Clear says, “What you repeatedly do… ultimately forms the person you are.” So, instead of promising to hit the gym for an hour every day after not going for a year, start with a 10-minute home workout. These small wins are what keep that dopamine going and overtime train your brain to naturally repeat the task.
Embrace the Discomfort. Change is rarely ever easy- if it was, everyone would do it. Doing anything unfamiliar to the ways you’ve been set in is going to feel uncomfortable, but pushing through that discomfort is where the magic happens. Nothing changes if nothing changes. Staying comfortable is safe and stagnant, where’s the fun in that?Don’t Overcomplicate It. How do you eat an elephant? Bite by bite. I can’t stress baby steps enough. A small win of mine that I always look back to was in high school when I wanted to be the kind of person who goes on morning runs at the park. I began by laying out my workout clothes the night before- no pressure or promise to myself that I would actually run, simply picking the clothes. I’d wake up, see the work out clothes and eventually start putting them on..
no park, I’d just wear the clothes (stay with me). Pretty quickly, just putting on the clothes made me feel motivated to step outside and it was time to go. Seeing the clothes became putting them on, putting them on became actually going, and actually going became clockwork for years. Now, it’s second nature and I can’t imagine living without my park time. By simplifying the process, you’re more likely to stick with it.
Celebrate the Small Wins. You don’t have to wait for approval to be proud of yourself. Each small step forward is progress. Choosing the stairs over the elevator, having one less drink than usual, or finally going to that class you lowkey forgot existed, these decisions release little bursts of dopamine, reinforcing the habit loop. Over time, these tiny choices lead to significant changes.
New Year’s resolutions aren’t the problem- it’s how we go about them that sets us up for failure. When we rely on a magical burst of motivation to suddenly transform our lives, it’s no wonder things fall apart by February. But if you take what we now know about the brain- dopamine, habit formation, and making changes that actually stick- you’re setting yourself up for real, lasting progress. And here’s the thing: success isn’t linear. You’re going to have days where you kill it and days where you don’t, and that’s okay. Change happens in the small, quiet moments just as much as in the big ones. Be gentle with yourself. Trust that showing up for yourself- even in the tiniest way- is enough. Your existence alone has always been enough. Trying and failing and trying again is enough. It’s not all or. nothing.You don’t have to prove anything to anyone, and you are not a failure just because your progress doesn’t look like someone else’s. At the end of the day, progress is about believing in yourself even when it feels like nothing is happening. Keep taking those small steps, be patient with the process, and have a little faith that all the little things will add up. You’re doing better than you think.
And if all else fails? Well… there’s always next year!