How I Feel Coming to the End of my First Semester of College

I am currently finishing up my first semester of college at Adelphi. Wow.


At the beginning of the semester, I had constant thoughts about transferring. I couldn’t stop overthinking my decision to come here. Scrolling through social media and seeing all the people from my high school at these big party schools hours, or even states, away from home only made me more insecure about my small, quiet school, half an hour away from my house.


When I was making my college decisions, all everyone was telling me was “go away to school” and “if you don’t go away, you’ll regret it.” And then I chose Adelphi. I was terrified that choosing this school was like caving. They say life begins outside your comfort zone. Had I chosen a school right inside my comfort zone? I’m the kind of person who struggles to even sleep over other people's’ houses, yet I am a resident at Adelphi. This was a baby step for me. Thinking about going to one of those upstate schools or out of state schools? That is not a baby step. That’s a leap.



It seemed like everybody was so in love with their colleges and were having the time of our lives. Me and Adelphi, however, had gotten off to a rocky start. I was disappointed in the clubs that Adelphi offered. I couldn’t find anything I wanted to get involved in. I hated my major. Due to the fact that Adelphi is mainly a commuter school, the campus was super quiet on the weekends. All my friends at other schools were going out all the time and I was in my dorm most of the time.


Now, I am ending my first semester with a great group of friends. I spoke on a panel for National Coming Out Day. I changed my major to an interdisciplinary major since I couldn’t find one that I clicked with. I wrote a press release. I started writing for HerCampus. I joined a club, where I met my current girlfriend. I’m even planning on rushing a sorority next semester.



That’s not to say I am completely settled at Adelphi yet. I thought about transferring yesterday I’m pretty sure. My school isn’t perfect. Do I wish Adelphi had more clubs? Yes. Do I wish Adelphi had more majors? Yes. Do I still struggle to find ways to get involved? Yes. Do I still spend a lot of time in the dorms? Yes. I even go home sometimes on the weekends.


But I learned a very important lesson this semester. College is what you make of it. So no, maybe I’m not at one of those big, far away schools that a lot of students dream about going to. But I wasn’t robbed of my chance to flourish and blossom as an individual just because I am close to my family. I’m exploring new fields that I had never thought about before. I am meeting new people. I am a part of the Honors College here at Adelphi which is pushing me to my academic limits and making me think in ways I never have before. I am in my first relationship with a girl. I am making real, genuine friends that have made this place feel like home.



So if you’re applying to college, or are in college and feel like maybe you chose the wrong school: Relax. Take a deep breath. That is so normal. Give your school, and yourself, a chance though. Meet some people. Try some new things. Talk to someone about how you’re feeling. Chances are you’ll find someone who feels the same way. Start a club if you can’t find one you like. Sports make me want to cry inside but try one of those. Get involved outside of school. Volunteer with an organization. There’s so much to do in this world. It doesn’t have to be at your school.  The college you choose is not a life or death decision. The ability to do great things is based on you, not your school.


Happy end of the semester! Good luck with finals! Take this break to have some much-deserved you-time.