Being a Woman With An Opinion on the Internet
Last week I had a discussion on the internet with a stranger. Nothing unusual here, it happens all the time. But this stranger was a man, and I’m a woman, and it didn’t take long before the discussion turned nasty.
What had started out as an exchange of opinion ended up with him going through my personal Facebook photos, saving one onto his computer, and uploading it in the comments section along with a comment on my way of life and personal choices that had nothing to do with the original discussion.
I was angry and felt that he had taken it a step too far at first, but then I thought – this type of thing happens all the time if you’re a woman with an opinion on the internet. Thankfully, he didn’t turn to the type of abuse I’ve seen other women encounter online, but it was still a frustrating experience. I didn’t even realise that my Facebook photos weren’t set to completely private until they were used against me. I’ve thought of changing it, but then again I think, why should I hide and make my online presence completely hidden just because some people will use it against me in discussions?
This experience is nothing, however, compared to the abuse women face online. Twitter is constantly asked to get better policies in dealing with trolls and harassment. Women with strong opinions are constantly being targeted and threatened with rape and murder. Behaviour like this is unacceptable in real life, and should be just as acceptable online. It is discouraging women for sharing their opinion, and even just having an online presence. Take for example when it was rumoured that Sue Perkins was a potential new host for Top Gear in April 2015. She received such abuse by Top Gear fans (mainly men) that she decided to leave Twitter for three months. Lena Dunham, creator of Girls, also deleted Twitter for a while because she was “trying to create a safe space for [herself] emotionally”.
The responsibility shouldn’t rest on women’s shoulders. We shouldn’t have to step away from social media to create safe spaces for ourselves. Not that social media should be a completely safe space, I encourage it to be a platform for civil discussion. It is useless to argue against trolls, as I think they will continue to be around as long as the internet is around i.e. forever, but social media platforms should step up their game with their policies for dealing with harassment and abuse. And old men should learn to discuss in a respectful way, even when they happen to be losing the debate in question.