6 signs it might be time to end the relationship
Most of us have been there. You’re dating a person and you like them. But is that enough? You continue to see where it leads but how much time are we meant to spend on someone before we decide that it isn’t going to work? Breaking up with someone is hard even if the relationship is clearly not working because you get attached to that person. However, many relationships should end. Not everyone is compatible and trying to keep it going might just hurt both parts. I wish that every relationship could be saved with time and effort but that’s not really the case. Instead, all that extra time and effort that is spent will make you feel worse when it does end. So what are some clear signals it’s time to bid adieu?
- You have different values Values are deeply rooted and if you don’t agree on them it can be hard to compromise. We all have our own values and that’s not a bad thing, but too different values can lead to disappointment in the other partner or even lead to your partner feeling uncomfortable. If the values are too different, that’s an early warning sign.
- Your needs aren’t met People need and want different things from relationships, and that’s OK. But if you feel forgotten about or that you want something different out of the relationship than what you’re getting and talking about it doesn’t change things then that’s a clear indicator that it won’t work. If it takes effort to meet your needs – the relationship might do more harm than good. Remember: you should feel loved and supported when you’re having bad days too! You aren’t just lovable on your good days. Like Marilyn Monroe said “If you can’t handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don’t deserve me at my best”.
- You’re not included in future plans If you’ve been dating for a while but you aren’t making plans together that’s a warning sign. Are you seeing each other as temporary or are you hoping for it to be permanent? Because if the answer is the latter, you should include each other’s minds when making plans.
- You are still confused If your relationship does not lead to security and a sense of clarity then it might be time to move on. As a relationship develops it should feel less and less confusing, not the other way around. A relationship should not be that complicated.
- Inequality
Is one part putting in all the effort? For this one I think it’s important to mention the book The 5 Love Languages because you might simply be showing your love in different ways and not understanding the way your partner shows love and affection. However, if you still don’t notice your partner putting in any effort in the relationship and you tried talking about it then it might be a good idea to move on. Again, showing love and affection should not feel like effort but a privilege.
- It’s superficial At the beginning of relationships you usually keep it light and superficial. Couples tend to open up about vulnerabilities as time passes and love grows. If the relationship does not go beyond the superficial stage, it might be a sign that it’s a dead end.
Remember, just because a relationship doesn’t work that doesn’t make either of you a failure. Each relationship teaches us something about ourselves and gives us experience and lessons to bring with us into the next relationship.
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