I have always wanted to join a sorority, but the intense recruitment process never appealed to me. I’ve long been immersed in the world of RushTok, specifically that of the University of Alabama, which includes a nine full days of competitive formal fall recruitment. Watching all the participating women with their perfectly curated outfits experience a mix of joy, overwhelm, and sadness (especially for those who don’t get into the house they wanted — or any house at all), I couldn’t help but expect that to be the universal rush experience at all schools. For that reason, despite my longing to be in a sorority, I could not get the possibility out of my head that I might hate the process of joining one. So, for the first few years of college, I chose not to rush.
It wasn’t until after fall recruitment during my junior year that I stumbled upon a post from my school’s Panhellenic Instagram account that said four of the 10 chapters on my campus would be participating in COB (Continuous Open Bidding) in the spring. Intrigued, I asked some of my friends who were already in sororities what COB meant, and they explained it’s a more chill, less overwhelming form of recruitment. Basically, at my school, it entails sitting and chatting with sorority members and low-key events so you can all get to know each other in an informal setting and decide if you’re right for each other. TBH, it sounded right up my alley.
Even though I was a little nervous, I decided it was time to jump in. At the beginning of January this year, I walked into the Spring COB information night — in which PNMs get to meet every chapter — with an open mind, ready to talk to anyone and everyone. It was a great experience; I got to build connections with women from different chapters and have my long list of questions answered: Why did you join this sorority? What was the process like for you? Did you do COB or formal recruitment, and why did you choose that route?
After much debate and talking to my friends, I decided to go to a COB event at Sigma Kappa, a hot cocoa pajama night at the house (a far cry from the dressy, seemingly stuffy events PNMs have to go to during formal recruitment). As I got to the house, I was a little nervous because I didn’t know what to expect, but as soon as the doors opened and I started talking to the other PNMs as we waited for the party to start, I felt relaxed. We were all going through the same process together, jumping headfirst into the unknown. When it was time for the members to welcome us with open arms, I walked in with confidence, and only just a touch of anxiety. I got my hot chocolate and was approached by the sweetest gal, who I clicked with effortlessly. All the seats were taken, so we just plopped down on the hardwood floor and started chatting away as a few other members also joined the convo.They asked me basic questions — What’s your major? Where are you from? What do you want to do? — but then as the conversation went on, we got deeper, talking about things like my passions and my family and friends. I felt so safe, like I could simply be myself. Eventually, the night ended and I walked out with so much joy, feeling loved and accepted into a potential new family.
The next day, I received a text and was personally invited back to the next Sigma Kappa event, a casual night filled with sweet treats and more great conversations. Two days later, as I was driving to grocery shopping with my roommate, I received an email from Sigma Kappa with a bid. Without hesitation, I accepted — and it was as simple as that.
Fast forward to now, I am a new member of the Spring 2025 Sigma Kappa class at the University of South Florida. COB was the perfect process for me because it allowed me to build and foster real, intimate relationships with my future sisters, simply by sitting on the floor and having deep conversations. Without all the pressure to seem “perfect” — and in a chill setting with fewer people around — I felt like I could truly be myself, because Sigma Kappa loved me for me.
Looking back, I am so thankful that I took the leap with COB instead of letting my perception of formal recruitment change my idea of joining a sorority. In the end, joining Sigma Kappa through COB wasn’t just about becoming a sorority member (although I’m so happy I did); it was about embracing my own journey, going at my pace, trusting the process, and realizing that the best connections happen when I am truly myself.