Winter break is great. That is, until it’s time to go back to school and you realize just how fucked up your sleep schedule, diet, drinking habits and priorities are. Can’t we just hibernate until summer? Read below for 14 things that prove your priorities have never been more wrong.
1. You stay up until 2 a.m. each night
…and wake up at 12 the next day. Brunch exists for a reason, right?
2. “I’m definitely not blacking out tonight.”
You’re definitely blacking out tonight.
3. In theory, you want to eat healthy
But in reality, ain’t nobody got time for a diet! Bring on the pizza.
4. Your bar tabs are going up
And your bank account is going down.
5. You can’t even fake motivation for class at this point
It’s even a struggle to sit through class during syllabus week.
6. You peaked last year
And you are now on a slow decline to total self-sabotage.
7. The Netflix binges are at an all-time high
Don’t blame us, though! There are too many good shows out there right now to resist.
8. Your roots are growing in and your ends are split
“Take me as I am or watch me as I go.”
9. Taking L’s doesn’t even surprise you anymore
Oh, I failed a test? Whatever. Oh, I got a flat tire? Whatever. Oh, the guy I like just ghosted me? What-fucking-ever.
10. Swimsuit season is coming up soon
But dinner is even sooner. Pass us a buttered roll pls.
11. “I’m never drinking again.”
You tell yourself. Repeatedly. Only to drink again a few hours later.
12. You wait to schedule your classes until the last possible second
*Two weeks into class* “Did you make your schedule yet?” “Nah dude, I gotta go to advising tomorrow.”
13. You barely even remember to take your birth control on time
Seriously, it can’t get much worse than this.
14. “I’ll try again next week…”
We doubt it.