The concept of taking a chill pill might be a joke, but at this rate, you’d be thrilled for it to be real so you could take a full prescription. Life is a series of ups and downs, but lately, you’ve had trouble keeping balance and would “very much like to be excluded from this narrative.” Here are some signs that you’re seriously stressed TF out.
1. Hearing “It’s not a big deal” annoys the living crap out of you.
You obviously wouldn’t be stressing this bad if it were a small deal!
2. Your body is sending you some serious danger signals that you keep ignoring.
It’s normal to rotate between fevers, stomach problems and headaches on a weekly basis, right?
3. You can’t remember the last time you slept through the night.
There aren’t enough glasses of wine in the world to get you to knock out peacefully.
4. And the idea of “rest” seems like a foreign concept.
This “relax” that you speak of…how do you go about doing it?
5. You joke about people taking you out of your misery but are actually 100 percent serious.
SEND HELP, A BOX OF CHEEZ-ITS AND SWEATPANTS THAT ARE ACTUALLY CLEAN ENOUGH TO WEAR.
6. Drinking has become a hobby instead of a social activity.
Not sure which is more soothing. Making cocktails or drinking them…
7. You change moods more often than you change outfits.
Today’s look is agitation with a few layers of anxiety, just to add some extra flair.
8. In fact, it doesn’t take much to set you off anymore.
It’s like 24/7 PMS with no relief. The horror.
9. Honestly, the only thing that manages to calm you down anymore is TV.
Netflix and chill…the hell out before you go crazy.
10. Or maybe a good cry because you’ve been doing a lot of that lately.
But you’re as in denial about it as the Grinch was when he asked himself, “Why is my face…leaking?”
11. You have become a pro at emotional eating.
And that means binging on Chinese food and ice cream until your stomach screams, “Please, stop!”
12. Or you haven’t had much of an appetite lately.
You know it’s bad when you’ve gone weeks without pizza.
13. Your friends and family are constantly telling you that you need to slow down.
Chances of listening to them are as nonexistent as your romantic life.
14. You can’t stand when someone tells you to stop being a “control freak” or “perfectionist.”
This is about as effective as those teeth-whitening strips that you used to use.
15. Sometimes you just wish that you could stay in bed indefinitely.
You prefer comfy blankets to human contact.
16. Your sex drive has gone way, way down.
Your mind has too many things to worry about to make room for X-rated thoughts.
17. To-do lists have become a mandatory, painful part of your daily grind.
This is taking “I can’t even” to a whole new level.
18. You have trouble concentrating on the simplest tasks.
Sometimes people ask your name and you blank out for a minute.
19. Your eyes sometimes twitch so bad that people think you’re winking at them.
MUST STOP SENDING SEXY SIGNALS. YOU’RE TOO STRESSED FOR SEXY. NO.
20. Your face is breaking out worse than it ever has.
Welcome to planet acne! On your right, you’ll find a crater that popped in just in time for Monday morning!
21. You’ve considered getting a therapist to help you cope.
Because you know that your self-care is a priority, not an option!