From the time I graduated high school to now, it feels like the country has been completely overturned. This is surely a jarring experience for many college students, but mine comes with an extra twist: Four years ago, I moved to the U.K. from Colorado to study International Relations. I am now in my senior year, and with this rapid change that’s taken place in the United States during this time, I have found a whole host of anxieties being so far from home.
There have been many highs and many lows studying 7,000 miles away from home. But I’ve found ways to manage all this stress and continue moving forward toward the life I want to live. As I reflect on all that I’ve learned, I’m eager to share some of the main struggles I’ve dealt with, and how I’m coping with them now — in hopes it could help a fellow student expat like me.
I always knew I wanted to live abroad. In high school, I did everything to prepare myself, from taking language courses to committing to International Baccalaureate studies with a heavy focus on geography. I was always interested in international events and history, but after COVID hit in 2020, I felt there was a measurable shift: Everything seemed more serious. Things happened faster. There was Jan. 6, the beginning of the war in Ukraine, and the growing effects of climate change. Little did I know that was just the beginning. But despite my increasing worry, I applied to the American University in London — and got in.
I wasn’t too concerned about the move itself. I went through the usual phases of homesickness when I got there, but I was used to traveling and being away from home. I felt confident in my ability to handle myself. What did worry me were all of the things outside of my control. What if a war kicked off closer to home? What if something happened with airlines and I couldn’t get back home? What if I suddenly couldn’t contact my family? These sorts of doomsday worries went on and on. The events following the 2024 U.S. presidential election only made it worse for me.
Suddenly, I wasn’t talking about the rising abuse of power in some far-off country; I was talking about it at home. My friends were seeing ICE agents in the streets, my family was arguing over who was right and wrong. I witnessed my public land stripped of environmental protections and foundational findings. New wars, new crises, new worries — all hitting extremely close to home… and I felt powerless being thousands of miles away.
All of this led to a very long stretch of dark months. I was very pessimistic about everything. It took away my motivation to study, work out, go out, and enjoy where I was. It wasn’t until I realised that I had been wasting some of the most important years of my life worrying about things I had no hand in that I decided I needed to make a change. If not for myself now, then for myself years down the road. So, I started to slowly make a plan to get myself back to that vision of the independent and adventurous student I’d created all those years ago.
Here are some of the changes I made to make that happen.
Reducing My Time On Social Media
One of the greatest challenges of studying abroad in this era is the constant access to videos and images from what feels like every crisis on Earth. I am constantly bombarded by videos of ICE raids, shootings, bombings, war, and environmental catastrophes from all over. The content coming out of the U.S. worries me particularly because it is so close to home. It makes me stress all the time about loved ones, constantly aware that I’m not there to support them. What I’ve learned is to get off social media and contact friends and family directly. That’s not to say that I completely shut myself off from the news; it’s important to stay informed, but I do have to protect my mental health. One thing I’ve done is only allow my news notifications to come at a certain time. That way, I look at them when I want, and I can decide how to deal with them then.
When studying abroad, it’s easy to limit contact with friends and family to posts on social media. But that is infinitely less important than actually talking to people, calling them, hearing their voices. That has kept me more grounded than anything when I start to worry.
Studying for Myself
Another challenge I feel has really weighed on me is the constant studying of all these events as I pursue my international relations degree. It means that as things happen, I can’t just delve into my work to escape — my work is almost always focused on the exact source of my anxiety. Yes, I chose this program. Yes, I love learning about it. But I really hate having to call emergency class sessions every other week to discuss the implications of the latest crisis. It’s especially difficult because London is a very international city, and there are people from all over in our classes, meaning there’s usually one or two people in my class who are affected directly by any given international issue. It makes these topics, and thus my anxiety about them, all the more real.
This can lend itself to a lot of pressure to completely devote myself to studying. But when there are 13 active crises at once, it’s impossible. What I try to do instead is learn as much about them as I can, and then talk to the students affected by them, offer my support as a friend, let them know they are not alone. I think every international student now knows the familiar pull of wanting to be home, but also as far from it as possible. Every time we discuss human rights violations of ICE facilities, or environmental setbacks in the U.S., or any other form of military action the U.S. takes, I feel that push and pull.
Of course, studying intently is not always bad. Yes, I become nervous about many things. But also in learning more about the intricacies of a given topic, I gain a bit of perspective, which gives me a small measure of power in how I react to these developments and gives me a semblance of control.
Being Prepared and Accepting the Out-of-Control
Speaking of control, there isn’t much of that for international students. I think I speak for many of us when I say we are broke, tired, and have no idea what we’re doing. For me, this has meant that every time something goes awry, I am either relying on my parents for money or scraping together from the little I earn part-time (stupid visa restrictions) and battling the cost-of-living crisis on my own. This has meant that I often feel I have little control over my life if, say, a crisis were to hit the U.K. This has me increasingly concerned about my own personal preparedness for a crisis. Not just in the U.S., but here too. What if I couldn’t reach my family? What if things go awry and I couldn’t rely on anyone else for help? What would I do?
In all honesty, I have learned how to take back a little control for myself from the Fins. Finland runs an entire civil preparedness program for every one of its citizens. (It makes sense considering the history of Soviet invasion, and now the active threat of Russian aggression.) The Fins have active protocols and advice for just about every situation you could encounter. I’ve taken to this because it doesn’t mean you have to be a doomsday prepper; just that you must be prepared if some very plausible scenarios were to play out.
I know Americans are very isolated and often forget that international events can affect us further than at the gas pump. But does everyone really know what they would do if the power were out for, say, 72 hours? This is the sort of thing I’ve thought more about lately as I’m surrounded by people from Ukraine, Pakistan, Iran, and other places where this is a necessary thought process. Following this line of thinking, civil preparedness has made me feel a bit more capable in my personal life, even if it’s just as simple as knowing how to operate a radio.
Holding Onto Hope
When so much is going on back home, it’s hard not to be a bit pessimistic. But I’ve found that simply enjoying what is around me while I have it is the best practice for peace of mind. If it’s sunny, go for a walk. If a museum is free, go inside. There’s a classical concert in an old church? Go, go, go. Grab every opportunity that comes by, and you’ll find it ties you to what’s really important.
London is an amazing city for this. There are constantly things going on. I’ve found I really enjoy the arts — concerts, museums, performances, festivals. Even just going into old churches and admiring the stained glass is good for me. I think all of these activities help keep me tied to the whole of humanity through those artistic expressions of shared feelings.
I’ve also found solace in exploring new music from all over the world, tracking down shops with vintage or collected artwork, and enjoying everything just for its beauty. In times of chaos like these, art is the best connection we have to people of the past. They can express all the feelings we are experiencing, but with the hindsight of hope for the future.
So if you are like me, studying far from home and worried for the future, just know that you are not alone. We are all struggling together. And all of the things I’ve mentioned are how I cope with it all. And hopefully, one day we won’t be coping anymore, we’ll be living.