Let’s face it, we have all struggled with FOMO, or the Fear of Missing Out, at some point during the college years.
Described as the feeling of anxiety that an interesting event may be occurring elsewhere, FOMO can actually be isolating. It can often build and build upon itself until it is an overwhelmingly real state of mind.
When I was in high school, my friends used to laugh at me for having FOMO from the slightest events in our relationships—why didn’t you invite me to that lunch? Did you invite Amanda to sleep over after I went home because you didn’t want me there?
Oftentimes, I let these unintentional actions dictate the way I perceived our friendships. And, I was almost always wrong. These weren’t reflections of their love for me; rather, they were simply times when my friends utilized their gifts of spontaneity to create fun for themselves and live in the moment. Instead of berating them for their seemingly insensitive actions, I decided to challenge my own views of each situation.
Tips and tricks for combatting FOMO:
1. Take a step back from social media.
This is often the number one culprit when it comes to feeling like you are missing out. Whether it is through Snapchat, Facebook, or Instagram, it seems that there are always other people doing things that are cooler than what you are doing. Reality check: people only post the pictures and videos of them enjoying themselves, not the moments of tribulation that probably occur just as often. Try to limit your social media checks to once or twice a day, and don’t get caught up clicking on every person’s Snapchat story on your list. It’s just a waste of time that could be spent appreciating the exciting moments in your own life.
2. Don’t assume people don’t want you there.
The Fear of Missing Out sometimes stems from feeling as if people are neglecting you. In reality, people typically don’t think to invite everyone they’ve ever known to a social event. They may just be going with the flow. The creation of cell phones and text messaging has made this especially difficult; people may expect a text every time there is a friend gathering, even when it happens haphazardly. Don’t fall prey to assumptions about situations. However, if your friends frequently “forget” to invite you, it may be time to rethink your relationship.
3. Spend time with people who reciprocate the care and love that you give them.
If your friends know that you are especially prone to FOMO, let them know. Having the courage to be as transparent as possible and letting people enter your mind may just make your friendships that much deeper and stronger. Find people that will treat you like you would treat them, and have the similar values and expectations of communication.
4. Practice mindfulness and staying in the moment.
Calming and quieting your mind is a developed skill, which takes effort and practice. Try to become aware of your surroundings – the light outside, the feeling deep inside your body, the smell of the air – and appreciate it just a little bit more each time. This may help still your racing thoughts that lead to anxiety, the root of FOMO.
5. “Be in love with your life. Every minute of it.” –Jack Kerouac
Make sure you are spending your time being involved with things that make you happy and fill your soul. If you stick to the activities that you are passionate about, you won’t feel as if you’re missing out – you will feel like other people are!