Hello old friend,
It has been quite a while since we last spoke, hasn’t it? Couple years, give or take; but, no matter how much time passes, I think you’ll always have a special place in my heart. However, I often find myself grieving songs I shared with you. They were so lovely and pure before, but they don’t elicit the same reaction anymore.
Songs are so much more than just songs. Songs are the painting of the voice, and there is nothing more beautiful than having a song that illustrates how we feel when we can’t articulate it ourselves. For example, I relate to IDFWY by Big Sean on a spiritual level, but I simultaneously enjoy Kodaline as well. No matter the genre, choosing to share a piece of yourself with someone is so raw because you’re revealing a vulnerable piece of yourself. You’re basically saying, “Hey, I want to experience this song with you because you’re special to me.” I firmly believe songs exist for this sole purpose, which is why listening to one another’s personal mixtape is so significant.
Finding new favorite songs with you are memories that I will warm my heart with forever. I’m not silly though, and I am aware things obviously did not end in milk and honey. Yet particular songs always bring me back to a time of happiness. If I could go back, I don’t think I’d take those songs away because they were the background noise to our lovely tragedy. I would like to credit you for my swift reflexes in changing radio stations when I hear a melody that prompts memories of you.
You did more than ruin my favorite songs however, you tarnished my perspective on so many things I believed to be pure and simple. My ability to get excited about a new song was torn apart because my silly self related it back to you every time.
Sappy feelings aside, listen up: I have since decided that you suck and music is infinite and ample, leaving plenty of room for fresh memories. Again, I still think of you fondly from time to time, but I’m definitely allowed to be selfish and listen to Big Sean while thinking of you with more than just a little contempt. I’d be lying if trap music didn’t get me to where I am today. Shoutout to you, Fetty Wap, for getting me all sorts of rowdy.
I’ve learned a lot since the ruination of my cherished songs and memories, and have compiled a whole new slew of albums that I enjoy. I would like to thank you for teaching me a lot about myself and how I’ve grown so much as a person since. Thank you for the time of self-reflection and personal growth. Though I listened to Taylor Swift more than I’d like to admit during this time of exploration, it was all a part of the process. I felt like I was in limbo for what seems like forever, but that’s just how life gets you. Most people in our lives aren’t meant to stay, and that’s okay. Just like songs, we replay memories over and over until we tire ourselves of the same repetitive tune. Eventually we outgrow it, discovering peace is synonymous with finding happiness.
Listen my dear, you and I had a great run. Though you obliterated any chance I had of listening to Ben Rector ever again, I forgive you. I am a composer of my own emotional direction and hereby fire you as the worst. As a personal request, just think of me whenever you listen to IDFWY and know I have dedicated it to you, much love.
Every now and then I hope I wander across your mind as much as you do mine when I hear a certain tune. Not out of spite or bitterness, but just to validate that the tune of our short-lived romantic era was a real one. It may be a little selfish of me, but I hope I ruined your favorite songs, too.