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As I lie here writing, I am curled up in the fetal position, my legs are quivering from the cramping pain that is spreading into my upper thighs, and the only light in my life is the way-too-hot heating pad that is resting on my throbbing abdomen. I am becoming increasingly certain that I committed some sort of heinous, despicable crime in a past life, because I’m not sure what else I could have done to deserve this pain.
This type of discomfort is all too familiar. I have been suffering from extremely heavy and painful periods, endometriosis, and ovarian cysts since I was young. I feel forever-desperate to find a pain reliever strong enough to bring me at least a bit of relief from the chronic sensation of being stabbed in the uterus, so when Advil claimed that they had created a special pain reliever designed to relieve period pain, I knew it was something that I had to take a chance on.
Advil Menstrual Pain advertises that it provides “up to six hours of pain relief from cramps, headaches, and back pain from a brand you know and trust.” I was initially very unsure – the only thing that’s as annoying as a man expressing skepticism about the severity of period discomfort (“Period pain isn’t even that bad. Isn’t it just, like, having stomach cramps or something?”) is a company that claims they’ll help you out, only to let you down.
I couldn’t help but roll my eyes as I dropped two pills into my hand. How could something so small stop a pain that is so large, so otherworldly? I popped the pills and waited. Nearly thirty minutes later, I began to feel some relief. I was both impressed and disappointed. Most over-the-counter pain relievers take several doses and hours to work, and when they finally do, the comfort is minimal.
I’m hesitant to fault any medication for this – my internal organs are a tough crowd to please. Nonetheless, while the pain remained and still remains, Advil Menstrual Pain came the closest anything has ever come to soothing my furious womb. The no-caffeine, no-antihistamine formula is a refreshing change from period medications that make you both wired and tired. Even better, the ibuprofen and sodium combine to move into your system faster than most normal pain relievers.
The pills won’t make my pain go away completely, and I’m convinced that hardly anything could. Still, if your life is impacted by severe and painful menstrual symptoms, this could be worth a bloody try.