I am an introvert, as classic as they come. I try my hardest to avoid large groups of people, and to be honest, I lose my ability to properly function when faced with more than 3 people at once. In personal opinion, small talk is the worst thing ever to exist on the planet. I prefer one-on-one conversations with someone I have a deep connection with. But after about 4 hours of engagement, I need to be alone. I need to “hang out” with myself and with the silence of myself. I always find myself making friends with extremely extroverted people who like to participate in big events with a lot of people and who adore the art of small talk. But I soon learned that even the most extroverted people desire time in isolation. Upon this realization, I found myself profoundly considering what is so important about being alone, and why everyone (not just introverts) need alone time.
Having a couple of hours each day alone is the best gift anyone could give to themselves. Every single person has a mind that is continuously going. We experience constant mental states and impulses to act based on these mental states. The thoughts inside our heads are something that we simply cannot get away from, which is both a blessing and a curse. We walk through the day wanting so profoundly to express these thoughts and feelings, fervent to share our ideas with those around us, or to demonstrate our loving feelings for those we surround ourselves with. I want to call my best friend and tell them all about an experience I had in class, which led to this joke or profound thought; a natural process for us all. What happens when we come together with another person or multiple people is that not only are we attempting to express what is going on in our heads, but so is everyone else. It becomes a mash of expression. We take in the words and body language of those around us and begin the process of making sense of it all, while still having complex thoughts and feelings for ourselves. While this constant give and take is meaningful, it is equally exhausting for our minds to contain. This is where alone time comes in.
Being alone allows us to eliminate all external stimuli. We are giving ourselves the time necessary to take in and digest all the stimuli of the day. We can silently consider the information that was shared with us, and we can fully experience our mental reactions concerning the day. When we’re alone, we can do this in whatever way we want! We can take a long time just sitting and staring out the window, or we can go for a run. No matter how the time is spent, everyone must make a habit of being alone. It is through being alone that we can fully develop thoughts, opinions, and passions. We can finally take the time to make sense of everything, and be able to move on from there feeling confident about it all. And after that, feeling ‘recharged’ and sure of ourselves once again, we can get back out there and continue to experience!
So I encourage you, take time this week to be conscious of how much alone time you’re giving yourself. Does your alone time match the amount of time you spend around others? Are you allowing yourself time to recover and process? And when you find yourself alone, appreciate it! It is healthy and necessary, and who knows, maybe you’ll get to know something about yourself that you didn’t know before.