Everyone has thoughts they keep to themselves, that they feel like no one else could fully understand. Whether it’s our quiet insecurities, fears of the future, or questions about ourselves, we all have secret vulnerabilities which weigh on our souls. What if these thoughts are more common than we imagine? What if the thoughts we are scared to share are what make us human? Here are five common thoughts we often bottle up inside.
- I Don’t Know Who I Am Anymore
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What does it mean to be myself if I don’t know what that entails? Growing up can bring up a lot of self-questioning. We always try to fit ourselves into boxes. Whether it be the “funny friend,” the “smart student,” or the “loner,” it can be hard to classify ourselves. I realized I don’t have to know who I am. A person can be many things at once, and not everything or everyone needs a definition. I’m learning that it’s okay to figure myself out.
- I Feel Like Everyone Is Moving Forward Except for Me
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Sometimes, I look at my peers and feel like I am the only one who doesn’t have everything figured out. It seems like everyone is moving forward while I’m standing still. But we only see a snapshot; we don’t see their insecurities, doubts, or whether they feel lost, too. Maybe life isn’t a race; there is no time limit, and no such thing as falling behind.
- I Thought I Would Be Happier by Now
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I think we spend a lot of our lives imagining and deciding how our happiness will look when we reach a certain milestone: thinking I’ll be happier when I graduate, when I get a promotion, when I become who I’ve always wanted to be. When we reach those milestones, it can feel like a letdown; why don’t I feel as happy as I thought I would? I’m starting to try to let go of expectations and live in the moment; I don’t want to wait for things to be happy before I can enjoy my life.
- I Don’t Know What I Want for My Future
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One of the most overwhelming parts of growing up is the expectation that we will know exactly what we want to do with our lives. What happens when I’m not sure what I want? There is so much pressure to make the right choice as fast as possible, as if one wrong choice could spoil the whole thing. I’ve realized our futures aren’t supposed to be completely figured out in college; it’s okay for our dreams, desires, and ambitions to change as we grow.
- I Wish I Could Stop Comparing Myself to Other Women
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Whether it’s envying another woman’s appearance, accomplishments, relationships, or lifestyle, comparison comes naturally. Social media ensures that we see only the best parts of other people’s lives. I wonder how much time we spend wishing we were other people instead of appreciating who we are. My lesson? Comparison is the thief of joy: we deserve to enjoy our lives without always yearning for what someone else may have.
Maybe the things we don’t say out loud are more common than we realize. We don’t always need to have all the answers, nor pretend that we do.