As I walk around Isla Vista, I admire the beautiful palm trees, blue skies, and warm weather. I am wearing a tank top, shorts, and flip-flops; this is my usual SB uniform. The high is 84 degrees, and I have plans to jump in the ocean later today. While other states gear up for a brutal winter, going to UCSB lets me have a never-ending summer.
However, something is missing without the seasons changing. Mentally, I know that summer is over and I have entered the school year. Even though I know it’s time to focus on school again, I struggle to find the motivation to grow with the different seasons of life when there are no physical ones. I am not alone in this feeling; many of my friends find it hard to make that mental transition to school and recognize change when the weather stays the same all year long.
WHAT SEASONS PROVIDE US WITH
I grew up in Alameda, California, so I cannot claim to have experienced seasons as someone in a state like Michigan has. However, after moving from the Bay Area to Southern California, I appreciate the micro-seasons I experienced growing up. I have nostalgic memories of going to soccer practices on fall nights, dreading taking off my sweatpants because it was cold. In winter, I would make the trek in the pouring rain from my high school to my favorite cafe across the street, The Local, savoring my drink of choice: a chai. I walked down Christmas Tree Lane, admiring all the intricate lights each house had set up. The blooming of flowers in spring signaled new beginnings, and summer felt like freedom from responsibilities.
In the sort-of seasons I grew up with, changing weather marked time naturally. The outside world helps people recognize that time has changed. In SoCal, the transitions become much less apparent, and I have had to find ways to make those signals on my own.
THE SEASONS OF OUR LIVES DON’T WAIT FOR THE WEATHERÂ
Going to college has been a challenging chapter, but I have learned so much about myself and have really found my footing. I have become more independent, living away from my parents; I take care of my apartment and cook for myself. I have made lifelong friends, and I am very grateful for that. I have created a community here that feels like my home away from home.Â
When I go home to the Bay Area during breaks, I truly realize how much I have evolved. Going home to a place that was home, I realize that things feel different because I am different now. Friendships don’t quite feel the same, and I see why: I’m not the same person I was when I lived there.Â
I have a strange in-between feeling as a college student. I am 19, but I don’t feel like the same teenager that lived in my parents’ home. I’m not entirely sure what adulthood looks like for me. I still rely on my parents for certain things, but I am also independent. This stage of my life is full of uncertainty, from friendships to what I want to pursue post-grad to who I am as a person.Â
LEARNING TO RECOGNIZE CHANGE WITHOUT THE LEAVES FALLING
Change has been difficult to come to terms with, but I am learning to accept it and initiate it into my own life. In this new chapter of life, my seasons don’t come with falling leaves or chilly winters, and I have had to make those mental transitions on my own.Â
I force myself to do schoolwork even when I’d rather be at the beach. I notice the changes I have made in my life, though it may not be marked by the seasons. Maybe I notice new maturity in situations I once would have reacted differently to. Friendships may change, but that is okay, and I learn to adjust.Â
CHANGE IS HAPPENING, EVEN IF IT ISN’T TOTALLY OBVIOUS
On my daily sunset walk to Deveraux Beach, I notice the same palm trees and blue skies that had once made me feel trapped. This scene may have stayed the same this whole year, but I am not the same person I was a year ago.Â
The world doesn’t need to look different for me to know I am different from who I was. I have learned to appreciate the changes, not reject them, and to embrace the seasons of my life.