I heard someone say once, “Be selfish when creating art, and selfless when sharing it.”. There can be so much pressure that comes with creating art, especially when you start thinking about how other people will interpret it, like it, or even understand the meaning behind it. Sometimes we become so focused on creating something that other people want to see, that we forget that art can simply be something that comes from within us, even when we do not fully understand where it came from.
Something interesting about my artistic process is that I often do not know what my art is about until I am finished creating it. I never really understood what people meant when they said, “You express yourself through art.”. When I was angry, anxious, or sad, I wasn’t intentionally creating something that represented those exact emotions. That has never really been how my process worked. When I am angry, I am not necessarily creating something “angry” per se, instead, those emotions seem to find their way into my work subconsciously. The more I create, the more I realize that my art often understands me before I understand myself.
Recently, I have been struggling with the feeling of being trapped behind my own thoughts, as I began noticing these ideas appearing in my artistic work. As a perfectionist and overthinker, I can become so caught up in the standards I set for myself that I forget to simply exist. I constantly think about whether I am doing enough, whether I am doing something correctly, and whether I could have done something better. Maybe it’s due to overwhelming expectations, uncertainty about the future, or being afraid of making the wrong decision, but there is something strangely universal about feeling like you are trying to move forward while another part of you is holding you back. I know that not everyone experiences this feeling to the same extent, but I like to believe that almost everyone has experienced something similar.
Sometimes, I think there is something almost peaceful about being temporarily stuck. We do not always have to immediately solve ourselves why we feel the way we do. Sometimes, we can simply allow ourselves to feel it, and trust that we will eventually move through it. That is one of the most beautiful things I have discovered about artistic expression. Art gives me a space to process things that I cannot always put into words. I might begin creating something without knowing what I am trying to say, only to look back at the finished piece and realize that some part of me was trying to communicate something all along. Maybe that’s what it really means to express yourself through art, not necessarily intentionally telling the world exactly how you feel, but allowing pieces of yourself to appear naturally.
When I choose to share art, I can hope that someone else can find a small part of themselves within it, but sometimes, the meaning comes later. I hope everyone finds some form of art that feels therapeutic to them. Art maybe doesn’t always have to fix us, but sometimes, it reminds us that we are allowed to be imperfect, and to exist exactly where we are until we are ready to move forward.
