Growing up, I wanted to be a princess.
My childhood was filled with the stories of Belle, Cinderella, Tiana, Pocahontas, and my favorite, Rapunzel. I watched their movies with doe-wide eyes, wishing for their lives. I wanted to be the intelligent, sought-after daughter who was saved by Prince Charming. However, that idea sounded a lot better in my head.
Let’s be honest, who didn’t have that dream? The magic and joy curated by Disney’s fairytales made it hard not to wish to be a princess. The point of these movies was to inspire young girls, but what exactly are they inspiring them to be? The story always ends after the princess falls in love with Prince Charming. The little girl watching the movie will never see her be a mom, a CEO, publish her own book, work a full time job. All the audience sees is the princess fall in love and…that’s it.
Don’t get me wrong
Even as a college student, I watch Disney movies of all kinds. Especially princess movies. However, it’s important to ask ourselves what ideas we’re feeding to young girls. They are the future of all women, and should learn to do more with their lives than fall in love with a man. The idea of finding a Prince Charming heavily influenced me when watching these movies; How could it not when the whole plot revolves around it?
Starting at age eight, I was reading young adult romance books. In middle school, I was boy crazy, in high school I had boyfriends, but stuck on this idea of finding Prince Charming, I stayed with some for far too long. I always dreamed of going to college to get a degree, but wanted to leave the men of my hometown behind and meet new options. I always dreamed of having a career, but as independent as I was, that career revolved around me having kids and a spouse.
Finally, something dawned on me
The summer before I entered my freshman year of college, I realized something: I had been worried for so long about finding someone who loved me, I forgot there’s more to life than entertaining another human being. In college, you make friends, but you only need to worry about your own needs. I had spent so many years taking care of my siblings, family, and boyfriends that I didn’t know how it felt to focus on what I needed.
A fairytale’s influence on my life
After completing research for my Women and Gender studies class, I came to the conclusion that I had been chasing an unrealistic ending. My ideal Happily Ever After had been engrained in my mind from such a young age, and I never questioned how it influenced my life. After seeing the opportunities life has to offer at college, I’ve realized women need to expect more from life than falling in love. Falling in love is beautiful, and should be an experience for all women. However, a woman’s happily ever after should be about herself, her own ambitions, and what makes her happy.
Each woman should consider what she wants as an individual. My new dreams are to solo travel, write a travel journal, live in at least two different countries, start my life out with an acting career and end it by being an author. If along the way I meet a partner who will support me in these endeavors, then that will be part of my journey. But my new happily ever after begins and ends with me. And ladies, no matter what it is that will make you happy – a job, a family, a career, or a small coastal home for just you and your girlfriends – this ambition should start and end with you. After all, it’s your happily ever after.