If you’re anything like me, you were probably constantly told have confidence in yourself — but no one ever told you how. For a long time, I always placed the idea of confidence on a pedestal that seemed unreachable.
As I’ve gotten older, I’m beginning to discover that having confidence isn’t the be-all-end-all, but rather, a culmination of your unique experiences and who you are working on becoming.
This guide details some practical steps for you to take on your confidence journey!
- Patience
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Confidence, like a multitude of skills, is developed over time. Just like you won’t be able to do a backflip on the first try, you won’t immediately possess unwavering confidence.
First, you should identify what it is that’s holding you back from being fully confident. Is it low self-esteem? Trauma? Failure? Whatever the reason is, know that it’s the unique origin of your confidence journey.
Second, take one step forward in opposition to your problem. For example, if you deal with low self-esteem because you had a negative mindset growing up, try journaling to identify why you foster this mindset.
Finally, know that identifying what’s holding you back isn’t immediately going to give you confidence; instead, it’ll provide you with a stepping stone to get there.
- Confidence Comes In Many Forms
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Extroversion can oftentimes be mistaken for confidence, when in reality, confidence appears in various forms. Some people carry themselves with a reserved confidence, when they’re assured in who they are but don’t always outwardly display it. Others appear more bubbly and are eager to spread their joy.
The way you display your confidence should be representative of who you are, or better yet, who you’d like to grow into. You don’t need to project from the highest mountain to display your confidence, but also keep in mind that you should never make yourself small or change who you are to fit a certain version of confidence.
You can always look for inspiration in those around you or celebrities you identify closely with. Personally, I admire my mom’s confidence, as she’s grounded in herself and keeps a quiet but noticeable aura.
- Confidence Can Waver
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A notable misconception about confidence, especially when you’re first building it, is that you should be confident all the time. Since you’re building it up, it’s natural to have a few hiccups. However, try to not base your confidence on circumstances.
There are some days where I base my confidence on my outfit, social interactions, or even how my classes went. While it feels good in the moment, it’s not helpful for building confidence long-term.
Instead, identify what makes you feel most confident and build a routine around that. If you feel most confident when you wear something specific or do a certain activity, incorporate that into your everyday life. Building that habit will help to ground your confidence.
Confidence is a topic that every girl has struggled with at some point in her life.
If that’s you, use these practical steps to help build your long-term confidence!
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