For those of you who don’t know me, my name is Taylor, and this is my first year on Her Campus. For me, writing has always been an outlet. When my feelings become too intense, or my thoughts begin to overwhelm me, I simply pull out a piece of paper or my notes app, and I write. I do this because sometimes the words I don’t feel like I can say, I can always write. I was nervous to write about something so raw and vulnerable, but over the years I’ve learned the only way to overcome something is to go through it.Â
For as long as I can remember, I’ve struggled with my mental health, specifically since elementary school. No matter what I did, this shadow of fear and worry seemed to consume me. I couldn’t escape it, and that made me feel powerless. Whenever my anxiety started to become too intense, I tried to tell myself that it wasn’t real. I tried to say to myself that this worry is just fabricated by my own mind, but how do you tell a 10-year-old little girl that the negative thoughts inside her head aren’t real? How do you tell her that the worry and the fear she is feeling isn’t real? The answer is, you can’t… because to people who struggle with anxiety that worry is their reality.Â
My dad is the only person who I feel truly understands my anxiety, because he struggles with his as well. When it gets really bad, or I get really anxious, I want to blame him for passing his anxiety down to me. Like, why couldn’t I get his eye color or his height instead?! One of the many good things I did get from my dad is his ability to put his thoughts into writing. He helped me find an outlet that made me feel like everything was going to be okay. He also taught me that no matter how powerful the anxiety may seem, my ability to overcome the worry will always be stronger.Â
Throughout all my years of dealing with anxiety, I’ve tried every single way you could think of to not have to face it. Whether that means finding unhealthy distractions, secluding myself from people, or simply keeping my emotions in instead of expressing them. While some of these have helped me temporarily to feel better, anxiety is a long-term issue that won’t go away just because you want it to. I learned that after many years of trying to hide from my emotions. One day when my anxiety was really bad, my dad pulled me aside and told me a quote I will never forget. He said “The only way out is through”. At first, I didn’t understand what he meant, but as I grow and mature, I realize how powerful those words are. It means you can’t run away from your worries. The only way to overcome the anxiety is to feel it. You have to go through the fear to make it go away. So here I am pushing through my worries and opening up about something that I’ve always had to fight through. It’s easy to get caught up in the worries of the world but it’s important to remember that you are stronger than your negative thoughts, and you’re capable of overcoming your fears.Â