The beginning of spring means a number of different things: the first blooms of the year, the last couple of months before the school year ends, and the beginning of race season. When I ran track in high school, the spring season always held superior to the winter season; nothing beats running outside in the crisp fresh air with the sun casting your shadow across the finish line.
Although it had been over four years since I ran at a track meet (and disregarding the fact that I was predominately a long and high jumper), I still had a love for running. Wanting to prove that I was up to the challenge, my roommate and I signed up to run a 15k in January, giving us less than three months to prepare for the race.
While I definitely didn’t train as much as I should’ve, I learned a lot about myself as a runner and even just as a person that has helped put much of my life into new context, especially as I begin to enter a new chapter with post-grad life just around the corner. So, here’s what I learned:
You’re capable of hard things
This seems to be a lesson I have to repeatedly learn, as I’m a professional overthinker that tends to doubt my own capabilities. Whenever I’m faced with a big undertaking, I can feel the anxiety sneakily creep its way in and make the task at hand feel 10x scarier. When I signed up for the race, I knew at some point I would be pushed to my limit with my running. Even just a month into training, I was already thinking of the ways in which I would fail. But that type of thinking is your brain trying to be your worst enemy, because you are capable of hard things. You just won’t realize that until you confront those fears head on, and prove to yourself that you are stronger than you think.
Live like no one’s watching (because nobody is!)
One of my biggest fears in the weeks leading up to the race was that I would be ending with all the people who cross the finish line walking. I knew my pace wouldn’t be very fast, but thinking about what my race time would be made me feel embarrassed. Because I was so caught up on what people would think of me it took me a while to come to this realization, but eventually I remembered that I signed up for this race for fun. I wasn’t doing it to win something or beat other runners, I voluntarily signed up to spend my morning running 9 miles because I wanted to! How you decide to run is completely up to you, just like how you decide to live your life. You may feel like you’re embarrassing yourself, but I can guarantee that nobody is paying as close attention to you as you are.
Don’t sweat the little things
I became increasingly anxious as race day approached. The stress that I was causing myself was not healthy, but I couldn’t help but think of all the things that could go wrong. In retrospect, I wish I didn’t spend so much time worrying. Like I said before, running this race was something I was doing for fun with one of my closest friends. The outcome of the race wouldn’t affect me in any way (except for being sore for a couple days). It’s more than okay to be nervous about things. However, it’s important to draw the line when that nervousness starts to overwhelm the rest of your senses. Acknowledge those feelings, but remember that in the grand scheme of things, this one event does not dictate the rest of your life.
I can confidently say that a career as a runner is not in the cards for me, and it will probably be a while before I sign up for another race. However, the challenges that I faced and overcame through this experience helped build my courage and remind me of my own strengths. Hopefully these lessons aren’t ones I’ll soon forget, lest I want to run another 9 miles.