A few days ago, my family celebrated Easter. For Catholics, Easter is the most important holiday of the year, even more so than Christmas. All of Easter weekend is a time to celebrate redemption, renewal, and the Resurrection of Jesus. Each Easter Sunday is special, but this year was truly important for me.
It was the first time in over ten years that my whole family (my parents, all of my siblings, and my siblings’ spouses and children) had been together to celebrate Easter. My oldest sister has lived in Connecticut for the past decade or so, and my other sister lives on the other side of Tampa now. Both have jobs and kids, and at home it’s my brother and I with our parents. This weekend, I realized how much I missed having all of us together.
Family holidays are not without their hardships, of course, but I’ve found a few ways of keeping the peace when the gathering gets too loud, personalities clash, or the cooking and cleaning becomes overwhelming.
1. Planned activities and games
We’ve all been there: an afternoon at your grandparents’ house with all your cousins, but the small talk has quieted down, and no one is quite sure what else to do. Somehow you all end up taking a walk around the block that doesn’t really dislodge the awkwardness of being with family members you only see a few times a year. For my family, my siblings and parents in particular, we avoid that by planning activities and games for everyone ahead of time. My parents have a pool, and we’re all happy to take advantage of it in the Florida sun. We also take out card games and board games from the back closet so when the conversation lulls or the kids are napping, we can stay active.
2. Bringing back “quiet time”
Speaking of naps, another tactic that works for my family is allowing time to rest or have “quiet time” in the afternoons. A lot of my family members are introverts, myself included. Even an hour or two of being alone outside or in my room leaves me feeling mentally and emotionally rejuvenated. Rest time should not just be for kids—it can be a great way of giving people space to recenter themselves, especially if tensions start to run high.
3. PutTING the phones in a drawer
This weekend, I literally put my phone in a drawer and left it there for most of the day. Besides wishing my friends a happy Easter, I didn’t text anyone, and didn’t scroll on social media. This step was important because it disconnected me from a mentality of being available for contact 24/7, and allowed me to stay present with my family. Because I don’t see my oldest sister that often, I wanted to soak up every moment with her that I could. I don’t know when the next time all of my family will be together, so it was important to me to distance myself from any possible distractions. It can be easy to feel like if you’re not checking on the news, your friends, or whatever is happening around the world, that you’ll miss out, but that’s not the case. The world will keep spinning. Time with my family is something I will never be able to get back if I miss it, but my phone isn’t going anywhere.Â
