I don’t mean to brag, but I’m really good at planning my life. It’s second nature for me to plan out my daily schedule, set goals, and picture exactly where I want to be and how I plan on getting there. I’m able to think about every detail, every step, and every possible outcome. On paper, everything makes perfect sense. Going about my life this way makes me feel organized, productive, and like I know exactly what I’m doing.
Although I may know exactly what I want to do with my life, I still struggle to take action. I know that I want to go for a walk after class, yet I still struggle to lace up my sneakers and head outside. I know that I want a new job, but for some reason, I can’t bring myself to submit the application. I know the career path I want to go down and all the steps I need to take to get there, but it still seems impossible to reach out and make the connections I need to end up there.
There is something so incredibly frustrating about knowing what you want to do and still feeling stuck. It’s not due to a lack of ideas or motivation. In fact, I believe it’s the opposite. There are so many thoughts, so many expectations, so many steps that I need to take, and to be honest, it’s overwhelming.
Planning is comforting because you have a sense of control. You can adjust things, rethink them, and perfect them before anything happens. The scary thing is that action doesn’t work that way. Once you take action, there’s no guarantee that things will go the way you imagined.
I think that’s where I struggle. Taking action means risking failure. I can sit here and plan out what I need to do to get a job, but once I’ve submitted the application, it’s out of my control. I find myself staying in this planning stage, sometimes for months, comforted by the fact that I have a plan. It’s a lot easier to sit with an idea than it is to act it out.
There’s also an immense pressure to do things the right way. To make the right decision, take the right path, and not fall behind. This type of pressure can make small steps feel like life or death decisions. When everything feels like it matters so much, it becomes harder to even know where to start.
Although having a plan can be a good thing, it can also add to the already intense pressure to succeed. It’s so difficult when you know exactly what you want to do, but you just can’t muster up the strength to take the leap of faith. Although it’s scary, I’ve been trying to push myself to follow through with my plans. After all, you’ll never end up where you want to be without taking a little bit of risk to get there.