I’ve been thinking a lot about cancel culture recently—how quickly people become despised, shunned, and excluded from things for making a single mistake. Even though people deserve to be held accountable, I find myself wondering, what is the limit?Â
As human beings, we are bound to make mistakes, but because the internet makes us feel as if we are under constant surveillance, one mistake feels like the end of the world. To avoid failure, you often see others detach themselves from society. Becoming more aloof allows us to take less responsibility.Â
It’s no wonder that Gen Z has coined terms like “situationship”—a label with no future semblance, as we are afraid of becoming vulnerable and making an unforgivable mistake. What we need to remember is that most people are willing to learn, and criticism can be productive (when used correctly, that is)!
Internet Communities
The internet only exacerbates the ridiculousness of cancel culture, making forgiveness seem impossible. When millions of people instantly try to boycott one person for a simple mistake, how can they change? It’s hard to correct someone’s behaviour when the only solution people can scrounge up is violence.Â
To avoid the internet’s cruelty, you see people (especially celebrities) reinvent themselves online. However, I think it’s more valuable to become comfortable in your own skin. By understanding our uniqueness as a strength rather than a weakness, we don’t feel the need to bring down others for being different. It’s too easy to jump into negative communities, but it’s much more beneficial to forgive each other for what we don’t yet understand.Â
Although forgiveness is not the kind of action that usually gets likes or shares, it’s a much more truthful process that we could be seeing online. Instead of cancelling, sometimes taking healthy accountability is the better option. It may be tough to empathize with someone on the internet, whom you don’t actually know, but it is an important step in the right direction.
Recognize, Not Repeat
To clarify, forgiveness does not necessarily mean finding unfaithful, derogatory, or any other kind of unethical behaviour acceptable. We can forgive others without excusing harm, but just because we don’t want to repeat something doesn’t mean we should avoid, shun, or not talk about it. We take history classes to learn, but also to avoid repeating the same violent mistakes. We clean dirty dishes to reuse them after they become messy. We take our cars to get maintenance done because we can’t always fix them ourselves. In other words, we are capable of recognizing our faults and moving forward as well.Â
None of us deserve to be defined by our worst moment. We are so focused on the extremes of who is “bad” and who is “good” that we forget sometimes people are just people. Sometimes, people are boring! We tend to forget this middle ground when people don’t practice forgiveness and refuse to look past someone’s public image (obviously, we aren’t the same person on the inside). However, the more we recognize someone else’s perspective, the better equipped we are to understand why they may have made a mistake in the first place. We can also acknowledge that one day, we too, may require forgiveness, and start thinking with the open and gracious mind we would hope for from others.Â
Forgiveness = Courage
It’s a brave thing to forgive. You may be disappointed in yourself for letting something go. It may feel like the losing option, but a world without forgiveness can quickly become a very isolated one. Think about some of the strongest, good-hearted people you know; now imagine how far they’d have come if they never failed, or failed without forgiveness. It’s a path towards growth.Â
Things may not always work out, but forgiveness will always be an option. Forgiveness may be a slower and far lengthier process than the speedy nature of the internet, but it is a human skill. It may be the most important approach to building a more loving world.