ICYMI, Emerald Fennell’s modern adaptation of Wuthering Heights dropped on Feb. 13, and it’s thrown fans and newcomers into an absolute frenzy. Yes, it’s hot, passionate, and raw — but it isn’t a sweeping love story. It’s a tragedy disguised as a gut-wrenching, heart-aching, and star-crossed love story. In fact, it’s the perfect portrayal of what happens when two people compete to see who can be more nonchalant, spiteful, and stubborn. And it shouldn’t be something you romanticize.
I know, I know. This might be a hot take — but it’s not like we aren’t new to toxic romances. Tell Me Lies, Normal People, and the After series are just a few modern examples of some of the worst couples to show up on the screen. And, despite strong awareness of the level of toxicity these relationships hold… it doesn’t mean they don’t rub off on us. I mean, how many times have you heard the saying that “love has to hurt to be real,” or that “if they wanted to, they would” on your FYP, or in your group chat with the girls?
And, honestly? I’ve had it with the amount of TikToks I’ve seen romanticizing Heathcliff and Catherine’s relationship. At the end of the day, their trauma bond consumes them, and destroys everyone in its path. I know we’ve all been victim to toxicity at least once in our lives, but moving past it starts with understanding what relationships like that of Heathcliff and Catherine are actually trying to tell us. (Because no, you shouldn’t want what they have.)
Intensity, yearning, and lovebombing are romanticized constantly in film and television. Think, The Summer I Turned Pretty: One of the biggest reasons that fans shipped Conrad and Belly over Jeremiah was because of how long Conrad waited for her (yes, the yearning got me too). But it’s no different with Heathcliff and Catherine.
They both waited, and waited. Of course, their situation was different from that of Belly and Conrad’s, but the same infatuation applies. The yearning we see when it comes to on-screen romance makes us want to chase that same feeling: As outsiders, we root for them so much that we disregard the bad that also comes with the relationship. Or worse, we excuse bad behavior because it’s aesthetic and dramatic.
Heathcliff and Catherine grew up together, became incredibly close, and developed feelings for each other. But their love is star-crossed, and they were doomed from the start. This is a recipe for a disastrous trauma bond, where cycles of abuse and affection and highs and lows keep them from straying away from each other. Yes, it’s passionate, but it’s also deeply dysfunctional.
And don’t get me wrong. There are plenty of similar romances that aren’t toxic at all. But it’s important to be able to separate the good from the bad — especially when these movies can be so influential. I mean, how many times have you heard someone say they want a love like Heathcliff and Catherine? (I’ve heard too many to be comfortable with).
And, it’s worth mentioning for those of you who haven’t read the OG book that it’s entirely from Nelly’s point of view. The subcontext that lies in the book from Nelly’s perspective is left out of Catherine’s. The film was entirely based on Catherine’s perspective, who felt it was as romantic as it was portrayed. So, if you ever wondered what rose-colored glasses were — it’s this. But that’s the point.
The film is a commentary on raw, destructive passion, as well as superficial interpretations of romance. But, if you don’t look closely enough, you’ll be swept off your feet by the visually-and-mentally-pleasing erotica before any notice of toxic obsession.
This is where on-screen toxic behavior can cross the threshold into real life. If you idolize on-screen toxicity, whether it’s because you’re naive or inexperienced, then you’re more likely to replicate it in real life. And why wouldn’t you when everyone around you romanticizes it?
Now, it’s not that you can’t like Wuthering Heights. In fact, I loved it. It’s just about navigating the complex themes of the film, as well as the romanticized propaganda that surrounds it. Some loves aren’t meant to be happily ever after — and that’s OK. You deserve a lot more than a raw egg under your bedsheets (if you catch my reference).