There’s always that one song.
The one that takes you back before you can even realize it’s happening. Suddenly, you’re sixteen again, driving with the windows down on a summer night, air tangling your hair, and the world feeling impossibly vast. Or you’re back in your childhood kitchen, your mom humming along to something playing softly in the background. Maybe it’s not a happy memory at all. Maybe it’s the song that played on repeat after a relationship ended; the one that somehow said everything you couldn’t put into words.
Music has a strange ability to freeze time. It doesn’t just remind us of who we are; it makes us feel it again.
And that’s not accidental.
why music affects our mood
The Cleveland Clinic shares that, music activates two major systems in the brain: the limbic system, which controls emotion and memory, and the cerebral cortex, which processes rhythm, movement, and sound. In other words, it isn’t just something we hear; it’s something we experience physically and emotionally.
Listening to music triggers the release of dopamine, the same “feel-good” chemical associated with pleasure and reward. This is why a favorite song can instantly lift our mood. It’s also why we crave certain songs when we’re stressed, heartbroken, or celebrating.
Music is also closely tied to memory. The hippocampus, a region of the brain involved in forming memories, activates when we hear familiar songs. That’s why every time I hear Juice WRLD, it feels like stepping into a time machine, transporting me to 8th grade study hall. Studies have even shown that music therapy can help patients with Alzheimer’s access memories that might otherwise seem lost.
Tempo and key matter, too. Faster rhythms can increase heart rate and energy, while slower songs can calm the body. Music written in a major key often feels bright and uplifting. Minor keys tend to evoke sadness or introspection.
Here’s the interesting part: we don’t always avoid sad music when we’re sad.
Psychologists call this the “tragedy paradox,” the idea that people are often drawn to music that mirrors their grief. Sometimes, rather than deepening our sadness, it can actually feel comforting. Listening to a sad song can validate our emotions, help us process them, and remind us that someone else has felt the same way.
Music is, in many ways, a physical embodiment of the shared human experience.
the soundtrack of our life stages
If you think about it, each stage of life has its own soundtrack.
In our teenage years, music helps us shape our developing identity. The artists we love signal who we are, or who we want to be. It can be rebellion. It can bring belonging and community. Playlists become personality statements, especially when Spotify Wrapped drops each year and we proudly (or nervously) share our results.
Young adulthood feels different. The songs we listen to shift with us. College. Moving out for the first time. Breakups. Long drives alone with too much time to think. The music we choose during these formative years often carries the weight of transition. It follows us like a shadow through each new experience. It stays with us even when we don’t fully understand where we’re going.
Adulthood brings another layer: nostalgia. Wedding songs. The first dance. Lullabies sung to children. Then one day you hear something from decades ago and find yourself saying, “They don’t make music like they used to.”
Maybe they do. But the music that defined us is forever tied to who we were when we first heard it.
In middle school, I lived in the 2018 SoundCloud rap scene. Lil Peep, XXXTentacion, Juice WRLD, Trippie Redd — artists that instantly take me back to being 13. Everything felt so serious, so deep, so world-altering. My crush didn’t like me back? My life was clearly over. Cue “Jocelyn Flores.”
For the first time, I was experiencing heavy emotions like regret, shame, and insecurity. Those artists helped me navigate them. I skipped lunch to sit in the bathroom and gossip. I threaded the wire of my headphones through my sweatshirt sleeve so I could secretly listen during class. Musical.ly had just become TikTok, the cringe dancing app no one wanted to admit they used.
In high school, my mom began introducing me to music that still holds an important place in my playlists. Pearl Jam, Radiohead, Tool, Soundgarden, Pink Floyd, and Foo Fighters opened my eyes to rock. Slipknot was my top artist three years in a row. That was also when I discovered my favorite band of all time: Chevelle. My future children will absolutely know about Chevelle.
Now, my music taste reflects a slower pace of life. Some songs I know will one day bring me back to this year are “What Once Was” by Her’s, “Brooklyn Bridge to Chorus” by The Strokes, and “Goodbye Yellow Brick Road” by Elton John, to name a few. Some of the songs I once loved feel almost overstimulating to me now. I find myself drawn to pretty vocals, intricate guitar work, and devastatingly cryptic lyricism. A song I can belt in the car. A melody so complex I sit there, quietly in awe.
What songs remind you of high school? Of your parents? Of a specific summer?
music and community identity
Music doesn’t just shape individuals; it shapes communities.
In my hometown of 156 people, and many rural towns like it, country music is more than just a genre. It tells stories of hard work, family, heartbreak, and faith. I don’t listen to country often, but when I do, the memories rush back: the Northwoods of Minnesota, sitting around a bonfire getting swarmed by mosquitoes, out on a boat, or getting violently thrown off a tube and having the breath knocked from your lungs.
Church hymns are passed down through generations. High school band concerts bring entire communities together. The songs regularly played at weddings, graduations, and funerals become shared memories.
The history of music permeates cultures. Each culture’s unique music, gospel choirs, folk, country and western, and more, I cannot fit here; each tells a story about a people’s history and heritage.
the emotional power of choice
What we choose to listen to matters.
Upbeat music can improve workout performance and increase motivation. Background music – especially lo-fi beats, in my experience – can boost productivity. Or at least convince us we’re being productive while we’re slightly distracted.
And when we’re hurting, we often choose songs that match the ache.
Why?
Because music gives shape to emotions we can’t always name. It allows us to sit inside a feeling without having to explain it. It’s safer than silence. It is a reminder that all of us are navigating the endlessly difficult and confusing human experience.
If someone looked at your most-played songs, what would they assume about you?
Your hopes? Your dreams? Your heartbreaks? Your personality?
the soundtrack continues
Life doesn’t come with a script. But it does come with a soundtrack.
The songs we play during our happiest days, our hardest nights, our biggest transitions. They become woven into our experience. Years from now, one melody will carry you back to this exact season of your life.
So maybe it’s worth asking:
What song defines you right now? And what will it say about the person you are becoming?