One of the most romanticized ages is 16. Everyone is excited to turn 16, to have their sweet 16, to get their license, and to feel older. Yet, after that, turning 17 can feel like a let down and can make people feel somewhat lost. I definitely felt lost.
At 17, you’re in your last year or two of high school, you’re having to figure things out for yourself and for the rest of your life. It’s chaotic, scary, and at the same time, you’re going through so many personal changes. At 17, I lost friends, I made new ones, I lost myself, found myself, and lost myself all over again.
Being 17 is not easy, you’re at such a indescribable time of your life, where so many things go wrong and so many things go right. As an older sister, it was hard to go through these things alone, but if I can help out anyone else, what I went through would have been worth it. So here are the things I’ve learned since I was 17 that have stuck with me.
1. not everyone is your friend & that’s okay
I’m such a people pleaser, SUE ME! I’ve always wanted to be well-liked, even if it cost me. While I do still show these tendencies, I’ve learned that not everyone is going to like you, no matter what you do. It was the realization that I don’t even like everyone, so how can I expect the same?Â
2. you have to be your own biggest fan
As a people pleaser, I often lost sight of what was most important, and that was that I was happy! It’s so easy to fall victim to societal standards and lose sight of your own wants and needs. This year, spend more time alone! Find out what you love and what you don’t.Â
3. stop comparing yourself to others
Just like the previous two, it can be very easy to get distracted and feel like you’re in competition with people around you. This is something I’ve fallen victim to so many times, and something I continuously struggle with. My best advice for anyone struggling with comparing yourself to others is to remember that everyone is on their own journey and that there’s enough room in the world for everyone to succeed.
4. you will make mistakes
No one wants to make mistakes, but they’re inevitable, especially when it comes to friends, relationships, and your personal life. The most important thing is that you learn from these mistakes and are able to grow. It’s easy to feel like your past mistakes define you, but as my idol Hannah Montana said, “Everyone makes mistakes, everybody has those days!”
5. prioritize your education/career!
In other words prioritize your future! The reality is, you’re the only one who’s going to be stuck with your decisions and your future, so whether you like it or not, you have to make the moves to achieve the life YOU want! I struggle with this a lot, especially in terms of motivation, but genuinely the best thing is to picture how you’d feel if you didn’t achieve your goals.
As your stand-in older sister, I hope these tips helped, whether you are 17, 18, 19 or even older! Don’t let these tips fool you, I still struggle with them all the time, and sometimes forget myself. But if even some of these serve as a reminder for you to keep going, I’ll have accomplished my mission.