I’ve been a fan of The Summer I Turned Pretty since season one came out, and I’ve been Team Conrad since then too. After all these years, one thing that has stayed consistent throughout is my tendency to be a hopeless romantic. If you’re like me who’s a sucker for a good romcom, then you know it’s hard not to let it get in your head sometimes. If you couldn’t tell by the title of the article, we’re about to get very personal. (Warning: This includes spoilers for the third season of The Summer I Turned Pretty).
Although the characters in the show may be fictional, the love that we watch progress isn’t. The love between Belly and Conrad is passionate and all-consuming, it’s something that I crave. Their chemistry can be felt through the smallest of moments. Watching their stolen glances or short conversations, I sometimes forget that it’s a TV show. Throughout the third season, Conrad joins the hopeless romantic club and is constantly sacrificing his own happiness for Belly’s. He helps Belly with her wedding errands despite it emotionally killing him, he convinces Laurel to attend her bridal shower, he leaves food for her in the fridge when he notices her not eating, I could go on. It hurts to watch someone yearn for something they can’t have. Seeing how Conrad handles his love for Belly has opened my eyes; he mentally stimulates her and encourages her to be her authentic self. It’s taught me that I deserve someone who sees and treats me the same way that he does with her.
I’ve never been in a relationship, situationship, friends-with-benefits, or what I would consider to be a proper talking stage; and I’ve definitely never been in love. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve always enjoyed being single, but I want to have this special person in my life who I enjoy spending time with, love waking up next to, and get butterflies thinking about. Part of me has worried that it would be difficult to commit to someone as I constantly find myself having new campus crushes, but that’s not the problem. It’s that ever since coming to Queen’s, I’ve never had enough involvement with a man where I developed real, genuine feelings for him. The last time I had a proper crush was in high school, and it was a borderline obsession. I found myself overanalyzing our every interaction, desperately trying to find my romcom in real life.
It’s especially difficult for something like this to develop because of how normalized hookup culture is. Following my most recent experience in this regard, I discovered that I can’t partake in it unless there’s some form of chemistry, otherwise it feels transactional. In case it wasn’t obvious, I’ve had my fair share of not-so-great experiences with men, the most recent being when I matched with a guy on Tinder. I felt there was a good vibe between us so I agreed to go out with him, but then I never heard from him again, and there was no date. I typically don’t take apps like Tinder or Hinge seriously and have never done more than add them on other social media – let alone agree to go out with them – so to me, this was a big deal. And of course the one time I was willing to take that extra step, it backfired. I tend to find myself being ghosted by guys that I feel chemistry with, but thankfully our only form of contact had ever been through social media. Maybe this was karma for all the times I did that to guys (but I only ghosted them if the conversation felt dry or that it wasn’t going anywhere).
If there’s one thing I’ve learned after being a loyal TSITP viewer all these years, it’s that I won’t settle when I get into a relationship. Conrad brings out the best in Belly – he encourages her to express her emotions, and not do anything for anyone else. Dating is a choice, so the person that you choose to be with should positively contribute to your life, rather than drain from it. I deserve to be with someone who truly respects and understands me for who I am, and so do you.
Who knows what this school year will bring?