Have you ever heard the saying – “If you are not happy single, you will not be happy in a relationship.” While this can be infuriating to hear, there is some truth to the saying. Your happiness should not be dependent on someone else. Moreover, being alone is basically a life skill, even though it is not something we are wired to do as social beings.
The fear of being alone can stem from a deep-rooted fear of isolation and abandonment or from conflict with self-esteem. However, the good news is that with time, one can learn to enjoy their own company. Certainly, it can be difficult in the start, but once you make it a priority, alone time (or date night) will become something you actually look forward to.
If you aren’t convinced, perhaps the three reasons below can be some food for thought if you approach the idea with an open mind.
1. Facing Your Fears
For many, being alone in public is a genuine fear. People are afraid of being perceived as lonely or finding themselves in an emergency with no one to turn to for help. While the latter is a valid fear, nothing makes you feel more independent than doing something on your own. If you have ever taken a long flight by yourself, you know the feeling I am talking about. Thus, spending time with yourself can be a way to reassure yourself; it can serve as a reminder that you are capable of looking after yourself.
2. Alone Time = Clarity
In our day-to-day lives, we are constantly surrounded by people. We seek advice from our friends and families, and their input influences the decisions we make. However, it can be useful to take a moment for yourself and tune out the noise of everyday life.
A date can be a fun way to spend some alone time and gain clarity before making an important decision. It gives you the time to think things through and listen to only yourself while the activity of the date reduces the pressure of making a big decision.
3. Explore!
I am sure you have driven by a street in your vicinity and thought to yourself, “Oh, that shop looks cute. I should go some time.” Well, what are you waiting for?Â
Taking yourself on a date is the perfect excuse to explore your neighbourhood and hit up the shops you have been meaning to. You don’t need to rely on anyone’s schedule to make a quick pit stop for a meal or try the new restaurant that is on your way home.
This can be an especially good idea if you have just moved to a new city. Going out on your own can help you explore new areas and find your go-to places. Try the places people recommend, even if you have to do it on your own, and you could be pleasantly surprised. Trust me, a couple of dates by yourself to find the perfect coffee shop or dinner spot is a sacrifice your future self will appreciate.Â
Conclusion
While taking yourself on a date can be intimidating, it is also extremely liberating, and once you get comfortable enough to do things on your own, there is no turning back. You gain confidence and trust in yourself, and this can be a time for you to reflect.Â
Trying new things and pushing yourself out of your comfort zone can be daunting even with people around but once you can do it on your own, you get the sense that you can conquer the world.
So put on the outfit you have been saving for a special occasion, find a cozy restaurant or exciting activity to do, pack your book, journal, or laptop, and plug in your headphones.Â
Lastly, don’t be afraid to say, “I am taking myself on a date,” and do so with optimism. Yes, some of your friends might make fun of you, but who knows, some might be inspired. What matters is that you do it for yourself. After all, who says you can’t dress up cute and pamper yourself from time to time?