I arrive at CU Boulder’s student orientation and hurry to the Atlas Building with my husband, Andy, in tow. After checking in, I walk over to the refreshments table and pause, reviewing my options before reaching for a blueberry muffin.
A man walks up next to me and starts filling his paper cup with coffee, turning to me to ask, “so, are you here with your kid?” I smile weakly before responding, “nope, I’m the student, actually.” Little did I know, this was only a taste of what I would encounter during my college experience as a millennial-aged undergrad.
As someone who finished high school in 2008 and had multiple unsuccessful college attempts in the years that followed, making the decision to return to school wasn’t an easy one. I had just quit my associate property manager job of two years and was sitting in Andy’s office trying to figure out my next steps. When he broached the subject of me going back to college, I remember laughing, thinking he was joking at first.
“Look at my past college attempts, babe, it would just be a waste of time and money,” I insisted, as I edited my resume in preparation to apply for yet another low-paying customer service job.
“You’re at a different place in your life now,” Andy pushed back. “I don’t think this attempt would end the same way the others did.” It took a few Google searches and several more discussions to fully convince me, but before I knew it, I had received my acceptance to Red Rocks Community College in Lakewood, Colorado and was preparing to pursue a degree in photography.
Despite taking an online summer class to get back into the “student mindset,” I found myself completely overwhelmed when I started my first semester and remember coming home after my first day in tears.
“I can’t do this, I’m in way over my head,” I said through sobs, “we took a test to see how much we knew about photography and I didn’t even know basic terminology! My final grade was less than 1%!” Andy held me, whispering words of comfort and affirmation until I calmed down.
“Nobody said this was going to be easy,” he reminded me. “But I know you can do this!” And he was right! Despite my extreme discomfort and doubts, I aced the follow-up test, pushed through the next three semesters and obtained my Introduction to Photography Certificate before changing majors and transferring to CU Boulder.
Now, four years later and three weeks away from graduation, I find myself reflecting on the different parts of my college journey and how unique my experience has been in comparison to other students.
It’s bizarre how the years continually pass by, but you don’t fully process how much you’ve aged until you’re constantly surrounded by people who are a minimum of fifteen years younger. I was even older than some of my teachers! Personally, I noticed the contrast between my mid-thirties self and my much younger classmates right off the bat, but was surprised by how easily I was able to blend in with the other students. Our fashion, hobbies, and other lifestyle choices had some similarities — the resurgence of Y2K fashion I used to wear in my teen years was especially surreal to witness — but were overall quite different, so I’d find myself flattered, albeit a bit shocked, by peoples’ bewildered reactions when they’d realize I’m at least a decade older than them.
For the most part, I felt like an equal member of the CU student body during my time here, but I’ll admit, I got my first tastes of ageism here, too. My first time hearing “millennial” used as an insult felt like a punch to the gut and even though I tried to not take it personally, I remember feeling extremely hurt and wondering why I was getting made fun of for something that was out of my control. When applying for internships, there were multiple organizations that told me I was ineligible due to my age, even though I had all the professional requirements necessary to complete the job duties listed. Another time I was asked to participate on a student political panel, but immediately had my invitation revoked once they learned I was a millennial, not Generation Z, despite me emphasizing my age and generation in the application.
Even just being a member of a college club, whose slogan is, “for Gen Z, by Gen Z” made me question if I truly belonged here or if I was overstepping boundaries and should just stay in my lane. Thankfully, my fellow members — the little sisters I never had, but always wanted — welcomed me with open arms and reassured me that I was a valued addition to the club, providing me with a sense of community and empowerment that I hadn’t experienced in years.
With different life chapters comes a variety of new and complex challenges, as well. While I was busy juggling a full-time courseload with the funeral of my father in freshman year, my wedding during sophomore year, and the purchase of our first house in my senior year, my classmates were instead spending their first years away from their homes and families, trying to adjust to life on their own. I’ll admit, at times I found myself jealous of my younger peers — studying abroad, weekly football games and parties, having the energy to go out after 9 p.m. — but in the long run, I was incredibly thankful to be where I’m at. Being more financially stable, having more life experience and more practice juggling multiple commitments set me up for success and I found that, while it was still incredibly difficult, it was much easier to tackle everything at my current stage in life.
These past four years have been some of the most challenging yet fulfilling years of my life and I wouldn’t trade them for anything. I worked in two campus ambassador roles, three different internships, participated in four transfer student panels, and was on the senior executive team for two on-campus clubs. I made many friends, fell in love with my new career field, and learned more about myself than I had in the thirty years beforehand. Overall, the biggest lesson I took away from this entire experience is that you don’t need to follow a specific timeline to be successful in life. Sometimes you just need to follow your own path and do things when they feel right for you.