As a mature student, I constantly feel like time is slipping through my fingers. The pressure to make the most of my university years while balancing everything else — my career, relationships, and personal growth — sometimes makes it feel like I’m racing against an invisible clock.
Spoiler alert: I’m not (and neither are you).
I didn’t take the traditional university route, so I’ve spent more time than I’d like to admit panicking over whether or not I’ve “missed my moment” or if I’ll always be stuck playing catch-up. Social media only adds fuel to the fire, bombarding me with reminders that I should already have my dream job lined up or be travelling the world. I’m in the prime of my life right now, after all (whatever that even means).
Lately, however, I’ve been learning to just chill. Not in a “let go of all your goals and vibe through the rest of your life” kind of way. Instead, I’m actively working on shifting my mindset and taking life as it is, day by day. I have to constantly remind myself: you’re not late, you’re just on your own timeline.
It’s wild how we’re taught that there’s a correct order to life. Graduate by 22. Land your dream job by 25. Be married, or close to it, by 30. Add in constant societal pressure, and that timeline feels even tighter. There’s this silent rule that you need to have everything together by a certain age or else you’re wasting your potential.
Here’s the thing: “being on time” is a made-up concept. We all have different upbringings, obstacles, and starting points. Some people hit career highs at 21. Others are just getting started at 35. None of it is wrong. What I’ve learned is that the idea of being “behind” only exists when you compare your path to someone else’s. Remember, your journey isn’t supposed to look like theirs, and there’s no medal for rushing.
We’ve been conditioned to think that our “prime” is this fleeting era of life where we look our best, achieve our greatest feats, and tick off every milestone. What if your prime isn’t defined by age, though? What if it’s defined by coming into alignment with who you’re meant to be? To me, that’s where the true power lies. That’s peak energy.
When I’m stuck in the comparison spiral, I ground myself by doing the following:
- I ask myself, “Is this a goal that I actually have, or is it one that I think I should have?”
- I evaluate what actually matters to me right now, rather than what I’m told should matter.
- I remind myself that plans change and timelines shift, but that doesn’t make them any less meaningful.
If no one has told you this yet: you’re doing amazing, sweetie (cue Kris Jenner). Life isn’t a sprint, but rather a marathon. As you drift through the seasons, you’ll have your time to bloom. Learn to embrace where you are, with all the messiness and magic that may come with it.
As I reflect on my own, I know that young me would be proud of who I am today. And honestly? That’s all that matters.