It’s okay to be called sensitive.
It’s okay to hold things deep in your heart.
It’s okay to forgive but not forget.
It’s okay to care.
It’s okay for something to be overwhelming at the moment.
It’s okay to cry.
It’s okay to grow from past mistakes.
Over the course of my life and in the one-and-a-half semesters of college I have under my belt, I have learned that life is hard. Growing up is hard. Change is hard. As someone who is so emotionally intertwined with the thoughts and feelings running throughout their mind, becoming more independent and finding myself over the course of the last couple of years after really coming into the adult I want to be, I have found that I have flaws and things I want to improve upon. Like most people, especially the younger generation, who are finding out more about themselves every day, it’s hard not to overthink these slight flaws.
Yes, I have people who love me. I have an amazing family with parents who have sacrificed their whole lives to give me the life that I have. I have a core group of friends here at school, and I wake up every day looking forward to the adventures and dinner conversations we are going to have. They are more than friends; they are family to me now and make Bonaventure feel like home. They make me feel like I belong. I have a wonderful and patient boyfriend who, even though he is five hours away, would drop anything to make sure I am feeling good.
Sometimes, I question, even with all of these things, why I feel like something is missing. I do feel guilty when I overthink or when I’m lying in bed thinking about the worst things or situations that could possibly happen. I know that from a young age, we figure out that we are not the only ones feeling this type of pressure to be perfect. Whether or not that’s through social media, only showing the peak time of your life and happiest moments, it’s not real life. Real life is messy, hard, and sometimes exhausting. You can have everything and more in the world but still not feel like it’s enough. The pressure to be picture-perfect and have everything figured out at such a young age is an impossible task for anyone to follow up with. It only leads to comparing, which makes you vulnerable to burnout and feelings of not being enough. Letting your mind wander to places it shouldn’t will only hurt your heart more.
My solution is to live in the moment. Make time for moments that make you smile and laugh for the people you love. You don’t have to be doing anything crazy. You don’t need to be vacationing at five-star hotels every holiday break to feel fulfilled. Surround yourself with good people who uplift your life and make you the best version of yourself.