Family dinner. Something I value most at home. As I look around and see my peers not eating dinner with their families every night, I come to appreciate that I do.
YouGov statistics state that around 30% of Americans sit down for family dinner at home every day. My family is part of the 30%.
Dinner is our time to be together. Unite again after a very long day of school, work, and sports. It is the time for stories and laughter. It is our way of staying connected, like families do. When eating meals separate from one another, in different rooms or while watching television, you are limiting the time spent with one another with zero distractions.
We do not take out our phones during dinner. We focus on each other. We rant about our day, the people we had to put up with, the grades we received, the new things we learned and new people we met. We talk about the past, present and future. We bring back old memories but also discuss our next big event we are excited for. Everyone gets a turn to speak, and everyone listens.
Every night we sit down, sometimes for 15 minutes and sometimes for an hour. We learn more about each other and stay close.
I miss family dinners. I don’t talk to my family every night now. I talk to them through a screen every other day and sometimes go three or four days without a call.
Not sitting in the same seat every night that is “my spot” at the table was a major change. I am no longer directly across from my sister while I eat a meal my mom just cooked. I no longer can enjoy fresh ingredients from our garden. Grilled chicken with perfectly ripe tomatoes and basil. Zucchini soaked in teriyaki sauce. Hot chili with a big soup spoon. These things are not served in the dining hall and even if they were, they would not taste the same.
It has been the hardest college adjustment. Â Â
I still wanted to feel connected to people when eating my meals. My whole life, I valued conversations during dinners, and I didn’t want it to stop now.
The first week my friends and I had “family dinner” every night. We took up six chairs and sat around the dinner table. Talking about our lives and eating the food that we wished our moms had cooked. We argue over who has the better bakery in our hometowns and I explain to everyone what a Rochester garbage plate is. We bond over this.
My dinner table is different now. I miss my family, and I always will. But something about this new Bona family feels secure and I love eating “family dinners” with my girls.