1. My personal favorite, walk around in workout clothes.
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This is great for tricking people into thinking that health is one of your priorities (over sleeping, eating, and drinking). It will also trick them into believing that you have free time in your life, which implies you are done with your homework and have definitely already studied for that midterm in three days.
2. Carry around a green juice (I promise you don’t have to drink it!)
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Carrying around a bottle of puréed grass will make it look like you are one of those mystical creatures that enjoy healthy food. No one will catch you eating your feelings in your room later.
3. Make sure to fully document your nights out.
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This is an essential step in the faking your life process. It is really important to remember to post as many photos with the flash on with both girls AND boys! This way, people will not only know that you are super fun but also that you are really social and are attractive enough to find boys to take a photo with.
4. Lastly, make sure to always discuss your outings to Trader Joe’s and Whole Foods.
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This is the final piece of the “I have my life together” puzzle. The more you talk about going to these grocery stores, the more hipster and healthy you appear. If possible, even make it your Snapchat story; this way there will be no doubts that you went!