Have you found yourself suddenly single for the summer season?
Like many of us, we started off in relationships that seemed so promising. You probably dreamed of the next few months and what you both would do, who you would see and where you would go, until suddenly…they were no longer a part of your life. You had not planned it this way, actually you were holding on hoping that they would change but instead you found yourself in a relationship with yourself.
Feeling alone in the summer months is not anything that I would wish on even the worst people. Everyone (even if they do not admit it) wants to feel the presence of that significant other, especially when school and extracurricular organizations are not taking up too much of your time. Maybe you tied your life to them and when it was over, you looked up and realized that you had not planned your summer with yourself in mind. However, this is the time to regroup, gather your feelings and live your life with a purpose greater than your ex lover.
This summer is the time where you should plan a self care trip and truly learn more about you.
Learning about yourself may take you on an emotional journey, but sometimes that is what it takes to detach yourself from those feelings that are hard to let go of. Learning about yourself will require some true self reflection and unpacking, but it is what will do the most good. Creating this trip will also give you some time away from home and to ultimately explore life beyond what you know in the current moment.
Do not cancel your life because a relationship expired.
Finding yourself single is not the end of you or your value. When any relationship ends it will without a doubt trigger some type of hurt that you did not know existed. Many times, we have this expectation of what our summers should look like and often times a significant other is included in those plans. We scroll our social media timelines to see happy couples, locked hands facing a sunset and even “baecations” that trigger your inner bitterness.
Being single is not so bad because you ended up single for a reason. Think about the goals you wanted to get accomplished this summer, think about the places you could go because of opportunities presented to you, think about how you are just about to reach your peak! Now, think back on that relationship. Did you try to hold on? Were you spending so much time with them that you would drop everything to see them happy? Were they emotionally available and not just physically? Does that sound like someone that you could carry with you in the ultimate prime time of your twenties?
Some days and unexpected moments it will hurt, so much. Sometimes it will hurt so much that you cannot believe that you made it and now that you have glow up and flourish this summer! Return to doing what you loved before you stopped giving yourself attention or pick a new love that enhances your best self.
No matter what you do, let the hard feelings come, set and travel on but after that have the best summer that you could possibly have. Sometimes this is done by getting back out there and living life, cutting ties and setting those much needed boundaries from those who are not improving your life. Show the world your happiness and what you can offer to it.
This unprecedented “me time” is here for a reason.
Once you have learned about your new self, love will eventually follow the way you expected it to do the first time around.