Depression is tough and affects a huge number of the population. It isn’t always easy to spot and it isn’t easy to get out of. It is different for everyone that has it and honestly, it sucks.
The best way for me to describe mine is like a light switch. I can be fine one minute laughing with my friends, and all it takes is for the switch to flip and the world seems so much heavier, and the laughter disappears. I don’t mean to be negative and sad but the chemicals in my brain are imbalanced and everything is hard for me to deal with.
Going through high school, I stayed in bed all day and slept my life away thinking that I just needed more rest and that I was fine. That is not healthy and it is exactly what I feel like doing every time my switch gets flipped. By looking at me from an outside view, it is difficult to see me as someone who deals with depression. I am naturally a positive and outgoing person who is very involved and outspoken. I like to have attention especially when I can make other people laugh. When my flip is switched I shut down and become very quiet and stay to myself.
Growing up with depression, I now know what is good for me and what isn’t. I know my signs and I know I need to speak up to my close friends and family. Just because I have depression doesn’t mean I need other people to feel bad for me and “help me fix my problems”. This is one of the worst things you can say to me. Yes it is okay for you to feel empathetic and want to help me out, but the help I need is support of my mom and dad and the mind set to get out of bed.
You can’t fix me. I am not broken. I am temporarily struggling but I am a big girl and will overcome this feeling. It may take time but you just need to sit by and wait for me to get there.
It is not your job to help me out or fix my life. I got this.
Getting out of bed in the morning is task number one and making it through the rest of the day is my responsibility. I will get through this and I will be fine. Your
support of treating me the same is what I need. I am a fighter and I will truck on through the tough times.
Telling me to smile more won’t fix my thoughts but telling a joke or sending a funny picture can make my day. So be patient and be kind, but don’t fix me, I’m okay, I promise.