No matter what your coupled-up friends tell you, Valentine’s Day is not always roses, chocolates and romantic getaways. Most people look at Valentine’s Day with one of two perspectives — a day to intimately connect with your partner or a day to intimately connect with a bottle of wine.
Especially in college, if you’re not in a romantic relationship on Valentine’s Day, it can be quite awful watching the cringey freshman couples walk around campus with hearts in their eyes on that cold day in February. This year, don’t feel bad if all you want to do for V-Day is sit on your couch and cry while watching rom-coms. I talked to nine members of Gen Z to get their worst Valentine’s Day story — and let me tell you, bestie, they definitely weren’t struck by Cupid’s arrow.
“In my freshman year of high school, I started dating this guy a week before Valentine’s Day. We barely had any time to get comfortable with one another before ‘love day,’ but all he cared about was showing off the fact that he had a girlfriend. On the big day, I was sitting in the cafeteria with my friends when I saw him walk up on stage with a microphone. He called me up to the stage in front of the entire school and proceeded to rap at me. I was just wishing for it to be over until someone came from behind me with a bouquet of flowers, which I soon realized was a quick distraction. As soon as I turned towards him again, he gave me the sloppiest and most insincere kiss I have ever had. It was our first kiss and it was all for show — I broke up with him the next day.” — Giselle, 20
“When I was in elementary school, I got a letter in my backpack from my ‘secret admirer.’ I spent the whole day telling everybody I had a secret admirer and was so anxious to find out who it was, but nobody would tell me. When I finally got home, my mom went, ‘Did you get your letter from your secret admirer?’ I was like… how did she know? She then said, ‘I’m your secret admirer!’ and I was devastated. Not only was my mom my secret admirer, but I had to go back to school and tell everyone it was my mom.” — Mckenzie, 20
“My ex was pulled over for the first time ever on V-Day for his headlights being out. We were coming out of a grocery store and he couldn’t find his insurance papers because it was his mom’s car.” — Jasmine, 20
“We had planned a few days in advance to go out for breakfast and then ice skating or something, like a cute date for Valentine’s Day. V-Day came and he woke up at 2 in the afternoon, didn’t even notice it was V-Day, fell back asleep, and didn’t get up until 9 or 10 at night. I told him it was Valentine’s Day and he felt so bad because the day was basically over at that point.” — Olivia, 20
“I was at my ex’s house on Valentine’s day and his family wasn’t there. We were literally just playing with his dog when his dad walked in and asked, ‘What were you guys doing in there?’ and my ex said, ‘Praying.’ I had only met his family about a month before. I was also wearing his pajama pants because we had gone to a park and my clothes got snow all over them. It looked so bad, and I almost died of embarrassment.” — Chloe*, 21
“I had gone viral on TikTok a few weeks prior for a video about how I lost my virginity to “Redbone” by Childish Gambino, and for some reason, people thought it was the funniest thing. I lived with another girl who was dating this guy who never left our apartment. He would always compliment me and after a while, it got weird. My two roommates went out on Valentine’s Day, so I had our room to myself. I stayed in and had a long-distance Valentine’s Day with my boyfriend.
Later, when my roommate and her boyfriend came back, I went to my kitchen to get some wine. When I walked out my roommate’s boyfriend was in my living room, and he was giggling. I asked him, “What’s so funny?” and he said, “I just… Can I please eat you out? It’s Valentine’s Day and I just really want to eat you out.” So I’m like, “I’m going to my room!”
After about an hour, I heard “Redbone” blaring outside of my bedroom door. I opened the door and my roommate’s boyfriend was standing there in his underwear. He was like, ‘My girlfriend’s asleep.’ I slammed the door and avoided him for the rest of the year.” — Ashley*, 21
“Two years ago, my roommates Kathy, Laura, Isabella and I tried to set up a four-way blind date for each other. We each had to find a date for another person in the group, and then we’d all go on a big group date together. An hour before dinner, my date backed out and they asked my coworker to come as a fill-in. My original date told me later he just didn’t want to go.
Here are the other stories: I was in charge of finding Kathy’s date. She was talking to a guy at the time on and off, but I didn’t know where they stood so I invited someone else, and it caused some issues with the guy she was talking to. Isabella’s date was an old friend who drove all the way from out of state. He ended up hanging out with her ex-boyfriend the rest of the weekend, and she hooked up with my fill-in date. Laura’s date gave her a bruised lip from kissing her and then ghosted her the next day. Overall, it’s a fun memory we look back on now and laugh about.” — Annemarie, 22
“My date’s name was a very generic white boy name, like Alex, so when I told my friends I was going out with him, they didn’t think anything of it because there are so many people named Alex. I went on a first date with him a little before Valentine’s Day, in hopes of getting a date for Valentine’s Day. I was trying to lay the framework down, you know? We start talking and he says that he went to the same high school as one of my best friends from college. I say, ‘Do you know my friend?’ And he gets sort of pensive and replies, ‘We were friends in high school but I haven’t talked to her in so long.’ He started asking questions about her, so I didn’t think anything of this. I sent a picture to my friend to show her I was on a date with Alex.
The next day I asked my friend, ‘What happened between you and Alex?’ and she says, ‘We dated for, like, two months.’ So basically I went on a date with my friend’s ex and I had no idea at all.” — Miranda, 21
“The day before Valentine’s Day, I was at a show choir rehearsal and I got a text from a mutual friend my boyfriend and I share, asking if I could call him. I was talking to my best friend about the text and we had no clue what he was going to call about so I was like, ‘Girl, come sit in my car and listen in. I bet this is gonna be some tea.’
So I got in my car and he called me and said, ‘There’s really no easy way to tell you this, but your boyfriend sent me multiple nudes and was trying to get me to send back and I obviously told him no.’ My best friend’s mouth was wide open and she was struggling not to say anything because the guy on the phone thought I was by myself, and I had absolutely no clue what to say. I hung up and my bestie and I were speechless because I had received Insta DMs from multiple of my boyfriend’s exes saying things like, ‘He’s crazy and manipulative’ and telling me to be careful.
I didn’t talk to my boyfriend at all for the rest of the night and was crying because he at least could have waited until after Valentine’s Day to cheat on me. I broke up with him the next morning and he was blowing up my phone all day, apologizing, saying his friend is a liar, saying that he loves me, and then later calling me stupid and a traitor. This guy also made a fake Snap account of me and posted from it so it looked like we were still dating.” — Owen, 19
Obviously not every Valentine’s Day is going to be filled with confessions of love and Bridgerton-esque lovemaking, but it certainly doesn’t have to include run-ins with the law and cheating. Stay safe out there this V-Day, and here’s hoping yours goes a lot better than it did for these unlucky souls.
Interviews have been edited for length and clarity.
*Names have been changed.